Hello, and HAPPY FRIDAY! Today isn’t just the 14th of April, here in the UK. Today is also Good Friday.
For those who might not know: Good Friday is a Christian holiday to commemorate, or remember and give great respect to, the event which we know as the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, and his death at Calvary, which is told in the Christian bible.
I hope your week has been a good one, and that if any gremlins got into any of your days, you were able to scoot around them and play them at their own gremlin games.
My week has been …. interesting. Let me explain.
I learned YET AGAIN this week that the minute I go out and buy new nail polish …. I break a nail. However this week, I bought THREE new nail polishes. I wonderful deep wine colour, a fabulous nude colour and a lovely nut colour. Three …. now this alone SHOULD have told me what was about to happen… but I just didn’t listen to what the universe was trying to tell me.
Well … my hands, fingers and more importantly my nails, were all plotting against me and the day after I bought said nail varnishes … I broke not one but two fingernails. The next day I broke another fingernail and a thumb nail. After that … the whole of my ‘nail world’ took a massive trip south, and I broke every single nail. I now look like I have never had nice hands and wouldn’t know them if they poked me! Hmpftttt!
I learned about these things this week too …
Coyotes in the United States have learnt how traffic lights work so that they can cross the road safely. Yes. Seriously! (I know! It made me smile from ear to ear too!) lol.
Franz Liszt was the first musician to have women’s underwear thrown at him.
Elvis (and this one blew me away...)… was born with blonde hair. His hair began to darken in his teens and by the age of 22, his hair colour was dark chestnut.
A baby echidna is called a ‘puggle’. (Isn’t that just one of the nicest words to say? Try it; “Puggle”. It has a kind of in-built giggle).
And on moving on from ‘cute’, and turning to …. well, this:
I learned that in 2013, in Turkey, thieves stole an entire 22 tonne, 82 foot metal bridge overnight. Yes, no joking! It was the village’s main bridge over a local creek.
According to the Turkish publication ‘Today’s Zaman’, the dumbfounded villagers, who needed the bridge to reach their orchards, alerted police about the theft. Police suspected that thieves dismantled the 82-ft.-long span to sell it as scrap metal — probably for about $12,000 at that time.
Aww … and this tickled me:
The very first armoured presidential car was a Cadillac that had previously belonged to . . . . – wait for it – . . . Al Capone. (Al Capone – Used Furniture Dealer – as we’ve previously discussed!).
If you are of a sensitive nature and don’t like any descriptive discussion regarding the mating of animals, PLEASE skip the next fact:
We talked, a couple of weeks ago, about Ladybirds mating. Now I’m going to edumacate you regarding bees…
Male bees – ‘drones’ – are happy to leave the business of the hive to the female workers, leaving them free to pursue their sole vocation: mating with the queen. Most of them are frustrated in this ambition, and those that make it die in the act. After the lucky drone has caught the queen and mounted her, he explodes with an audible pop as he ejaculates. He then falls off the Queen Bee, usually leaving a portion of his phallus behind him.
And a little more Bee information which I’ve learned this week (this time it’s not about s.e.x.):
Some bees literally shake pollen out of flowers by humming very loudly at them. Rapid muscle contractions produce forces of up to 30G – about three times the force of a fighter jet making a tight turn – and the vibrations dislodge pollen grains from a flower’s anthers, in a process called ‘buzz pollination‘ or ‘sonication‘. Honeybees don’t do it, but bumblebees and many others do; various economically important plants, including kiwi fruits, blueberries and cranberries, are pollinated in this way.
Fascinating, eh?
More throw away little bits of interesting things I learned this week …
The chairman of a company is four times more likely to be a psychopath than the doorman.
China gets a new skyscraper every five days.
In 1999, more than 3,000 people were hospitalised after . . . tripping over a laundry basket! (I kid ye not!)
And finally, on our voyage of fascinating facts … just to spoil your Easter of chocolate eating . . .
A lethal dose of chocolate for a human being is about 22 lb or 40 bars of Cadbury’s Dairy Milk. A single M&M is enough to kill a small songbird.
And now … the reason you’re really here ….
THE JOKES!
What did one eye say to the other eye? Between the two of us, something smells.
❤
Did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine? Don’t worry. He’s completely recovered.
❤
What did the Ocean say to the boat? Nothing, it just waves
❤
What happens when you throw a white hat into the red sea? . . . . . It gets wet
❤
What did the banana say to the hippo? . . . . Nothing, Bananas don’t talk
❤
How do you light up a Tennis Stadium? . . . . With a good match.
❤
What did the grape say when it got stepped on? . . . It just let out a little wine.
❤
and finally …
here’s one for my favourite Chicken …. (Chicken Grandma)
❤
What do you call a chicken at the north pole? . . . Lost
😀
Well that’s it …. well no, actually … that’s almost it. I have a letter I need to post:
Dear Toys R Us. I’ve had to visit my nearest store three times during the past week, and not once has any member of your staff smiled, acknowledged me by looking me in the eye when making an enquiry, or even looked at me when I made a purchase. You need to do some staff retraining and possibly show your staff that they’re important to you so that they know that WE are important to you too. I shall be writing more about this directly to you, Trust Me. ~ A furrowed brow customer, Cobs.
Ok … I’ve run to the post office and posted that, so all that’s left to do is to say a BIG THANK YOU to you for coming and having a coffee with me. I so love seeing you here, all crowded around the kitchen table, laughing, chatting and just having a bit of fun. Such a great feeling.
I wish you a lovely Friday, followed by a truly fantabulous weekend. Do something different this weekend. Go somewhere you haven’t been before. Read a book you’ve been meaning to read. Make a phone call to someone you haven’t spoken to in a while. Tell someone how much you enjoy their company, or appreciate them for _____ …. well whatever it is you appreciate them for.
Make yourself happy, and make someone else happy. It’s important.
Sending big Easter Squidges, from me here in my corner, to you there in yours.
The Art of Cobwebs 