The Friday Post ~ Classified Ads . . .

Happy Friday!   Again, yet another week has passed and I still haven’t found the secret to stopping the clocks so that I remain the child I am at heart.  One day I’m going to crack that secret and I’ll share it with you, so you can all stay young along with me.  I’m pretty sure the world would be able to handle it.  (although mind … there are a small handful of us who the world might just struggle with …  lol)

Well …  I hope you have your Chuckle Muscle in good shape, for this is the required item you’ll need for this weeks Friday Post.

It’s the Summer,  and people are looking to sort out their houses and get rid of things they’re no longer using,  by putting an advert in a newspaper in order to sell those things.  Or some folks have a business which they are looking to promote and add a few pennies to the holiday fund.

All this is leading me to sharing some of those folks adverts with you.  Are you ready with your chuckle muscle?  Sure?  Ok … let’s go . . .

CLASSIFIED ADS
Actual genuine excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers:

ILLITERATE?  WRITE  TODAY FOR FREE HELP.

AUTO REPAIR SERVICE.  FREE PICK-UP AND DELIVERY.   TRY US ONCE, YOU’LL NEVER GO ANYWHERE AGAIN.

OUR EXPERIENCED MOM WILL CARE FOR YOUR CHILD. FENCED YARD, MEALS, AND SMACKS INCLUDED.

DOG FOR SALE: EATS ANYTHING AND IS FOND OF CHILDREN.

STOCK UP AND SAVE.   LIMIT: ONE.

SEMI-ANNUAL AFTER-CHRISTMAS SALE.

3-YEAR-OLD TEACHER NEEDED FOR PRE-SCHOOL.  EXPERIENCE PREFERRED.

MIXING BOWL SET DESIGNED TO PLEASE A COOK WITH ROUND BOTTOM FOR EFFICIENT BEATING.

DINNER SPECIAL — TURKEY $2.35;  CHICKEN OR BEEF $2.25;  CHILDREN $2.00.

FOR SALE: ANTIQUE DESK SUITABLE FOR LADY WITH THICK LEGS AND LARGE DRAWERS.

NOW IS YOUR CHANCE TO HAVE YOUR EARS PIERCED AND GET AN EXTRA PAIR TO TAKE HOME, TOO.

WE DO NOT TEAR YOUR CLOTHING WITH MACHINERY. WE DO IT CAREFULLY BY HAND.

HAVE SEVERAL VERY OLD DRESSES FROM GRANDMOTHER IN BEAUTIFUL CONDITION.

TIRED OF CLEANING YOURSELF?   LET ME DO IT.

VACATION SPECIAL: HAVE YOUR HOME EXTERMINATED.

MT. KILIMANJARO, THE BREATHTAKING BACKDROP FOR THE SERENA LODGE. SWIM IN THE LOVELY POOL WHILE YOU DRINK IT ALL IN.

THE HOTEL HAS BOWLING ALLEYS, TENNIS COURTS, COMFORTABLE BEDS, AND OTHER ATHLETIC FACILITIES.

TOASTER: A GIFT THAT EVERY MEMBER OF THE FAMILY APPRECIATES. AUTOMATICALLY BURNS TOAST.

MAN, HONEST. WILL TAKE ANYTHING.

USED CARS: WHY GO ELSEWHERE TO BE CHEATED? COME HERE FIRST.

CHRISTMAS TAG-SALE. HANDMADE GIFTS FOR THE HARD-TO-FIND PERSON.

WANTED: HAIR CUTTER. EXCELLENT GROWTH POTENTIAL.

WANTED. MAN TO TAKE CARE OF COW THAT DOES NOT SMOKE OR DRINK.

OUR BIKINIS ARE EXCITING. THEY ARE SIMPLY THE TOPS.

WANTED. WIDOWER WITH SCHOOL-AGE CHILDREN REQUIRED TO ASSUME GENERAL HOUSEKEEPING DUTIES. MUST BE CAPABLE OF CONTRIBUTING TO GROWTH OF FAMILY.

WE WILL OIL YOUR SEWING MACHINE AND ADJUST TENSION IN YOUR HOME FOR $1.00.

MAN WANTED TO WORK IN DYNAMITE FACTORY. MUST BE WILLING TO TRAVEL

And just in case you still have a little coffee in your cup and want a tad more entertainment, I share with you…  Signs, as found on You Tube:

Well that’s me done and dusted for another ‘Friday Post’.

All that’s left for me to say is …  have a truly blessed rest of your day, and I hope your weekend is peace filled and leaves you feeling contented.   And,  finally, …  remember to be a little kinder than you might think necessary.  Each one of us is fighting our own battle.  I may not see your battle, and you don’t know what mine is, but I’d like people to be kind to me in the same way I’m kind to them.  So … be a little kinder to all that you meet and interact with this weekend.  Who knows . . .  your kindness could just be the thing which enables someone to carry on carrying on.

Sending my love and a bucket full of squidges ~

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

Happy Friday, 26th May.  It’s the last Friday of May. Time, as we’ve already agreed, passes fast now.

It’s  ‘been a week’  this week. There’s been some fun.  But then there have been some very low spots.

For those of you who don’t know …  I live in the United Kingdom, and I’m pretty sure you’ll all know about the savage brutality which happened in my country on Monday, the 22nd of May.

The first thing my brain said was:  ‘Why?  Why in the name of God would someone believe that it’s OK to kill someone?  Anyone?  Children, teens, through to Grandma’s and grown ups.  Why?’

And … that’s the thing.  Exactly what is it which happens inside someone’s brain, which convinces them to kill,  maim,  injure,  mutilate,  lacerate,  disfigure,  and mangle innocent people in order to ‘please’  their  God?

Who’s God tells them that this is OK? 

NO God is going to tell ANYONE that it’s OK to kill any other person.  In fact it’s the exact opposite of that which ANY God would say.

Someone is brain-washing these people, because that’s the only way that someone is going to have their normal thinking brain, turned into a willing slave in order to carry out someone elses instructions.

I’ve cried many hot tears over this vile act of evil savagery and even now, 4 days later, I know I’m still not all cried out.    However, something a dear blogging friend, Chicken Grandma,  said on her blog a couple of days ago, as a reply to a comment I posted:  “May we be light, may we be strong, may we be courageous, and may we as people of the world stand united in the process of bringing sanity back.”. 

And she’s right.  We must be strong, courageous, and we must stand united in bringing back the sanity to our World.  We must also try to love those who wish to do us harm.  For two wrongs don’t make a right.  An eye for an eye simply ends up making the whole world blind.

If we are to overcome, we must all stand together as one, and, using love,  save this world.

Shall we move onto something more entertaining?

Mr. Cobs shared this with me this week …

He was reading the papers, on-line, and came across a story about a product being sold on Amazon which tickled the heck out of him.  (He does have a very ‘off centre’ sort of sense of humour – but then, look who he’s married to! :/ lol)

The details of the product read like this:  (if you have trouble reading or looking at any photos, right-click on the photo and click to ‘view image’ – and it will open up in a larger size.)

Loo Brush 1

Now that seems pretty straight forward, doesn’t it?  A toilet brush … gives you the idea that you’ll know what to use it for…  however …  someone decided they’d have a little fun with some feedback for this  . . .  (ladies … do you have on your Depends?) . . .

Loo Brush feedback1

Well dear ol’ Mr.C was laughing his head off – but at the same time trying to keep it together, and he was going red in the face and sounded more like Muttley than Cobs the Bogeyman!

Once I’d seen it …  I sounded like that too.  lol.  Apparently it’s quite a trend, I understand, to outdo anyone else with the funny feedback on things.  I found out that reviews for Sugar Free Gummie Bears are among the funniest things to read on Amazon.  lol

What else have I learned this week?

That Indian Curries are now off the menu.   I came late to Indian food.  I was pregnant with daughter number 2 when all of a sudden I announced that the neighbour must have been making a curry, and it smelled DELICIOUS!

Before this I hated curry.  The smell could make me heave.  But suddenly, at six months pregnant with second child, all I wanted was an Indian curry.  Mr. Cobs thought he’d died and gone to heaven!   The very next day he bought everything required for making one, and made it, and I’ve eaten curries Indian food ever since.  Until now.  Now that I’ve reached over the age of  ___  it would seem that my body is now saying NO MORE to Indian food.  Actually … it’s begun saying no more to a fair few different bits of food.  It’s making me quite cross.  How very dare it move me into a boring diet of denial.

Deny me this.  Deny me that.  Deny me everything I might find enjoyable.  It’s even now stopped me from eating ….  CUCUMBER!  Cucumber is basically water with a green skin.  So what’s the problem?  [sigh]

I also learned this week …  yet again .…  that I HATE the hot hot heat of summer.  I live in the south of the country (England) by the sea,  and it get’s quite ‘hot’ here in the summer.  I don’t like the summer much because it causes me to get grumpy and makes some medical ‘issues’ I have so much worse that it’s tiresome and annoying.

Note to other drivers on the road:   Drive NICELY.  Don’t cut me up nor follow so closely behind me that it’s obscene, during the heat of the summer.  Because I become something other than the sweet thing you might think I am to look at me.  Trust me.  Mightier men than you have tried to show me, ‘the little woman’, that their driving is wonderful …  and I’ve left them crying and sucking their thumbs.  DRIVE NICELY in the summer, around where I live,  or else!  You have been warned.

Well … this last week it’s been hot.  Very hot.  Too hot.  VERY MUCH too hot.  We have ceiling fans …  but even those aren’t helping.  They seem to just be moving hot air around.  And now … I’m feeling like a grumpy moo.  I’m hot.  I’m sticky.  And I’m not in a great mood.

Note to self:  When I win the lottery (big time), I’m going to pay someone to fan me.  I shall lay on a bed of hand-made cotton mattresses – 8 deep. (Think Princess and the Pea), wearing nothing but a muslin ‘gown’ (designed by a tent maker), and be fanned by my personal fanner.  Ahhh… just the thought is putting my mood right.  😀

Kind of on the same subject ...  I also learned this week that my Grandsons (Little Cobs) school has been forced to employ a parking attendant for when mummies and daddies collect their darlings from school at the end of the day.  (3pm)

I learned that this parking attendant (a tall man of somewhere between 30 to 40) has let the job title, and the yellow High Vis jacket (much like the motorway police wear) go to his head, and he’s become a bossy so and so.

I watched him, as I was sat roasting at the equivalent to Gas Mark 6, in my car, in the full sun.  He arrived on site and without even leaving his car, he wound down the window and instantly told a woman to move her car out of the reserved parking space. (Which she did.  A rookie mistake)  He then parked his car in that space, got out of his car, put on his yellow High Visibility jacket and then walked over to her where she’d now parked her car on the corner of a bend on the school grounds, and directed her to go and park on the road outside the school.

It was at this point that Mr.Cobs was to hear me say, low and in a rather wishful thinking voice:  “Ohhhh….  I DO hope he comes here and tells me where to park my car”.

Because Little Cobs has a disability (Cerebral Palsy) his mummy and daddy are allowed to park on the school grounds to collect their son.  However, we are sometimes called into action to collect him.  And the problem is that although the school know when we will be coming (instead of Mommy or Daddy), we don’t have the special parking permit which one is supposed to display in order to park on the premises.  So, strictly speaking, he should have noticed that I was parked without a permit.

I was hot.  Roasting in the direct sunshine, and I saw him being a little officious and pumped up at wearing his High Vis. jacket.  I SO wanted him to come to my car and attempt to ‘talk to the little lady’ (me) about parking else where.  I so wanted to explain to him that the only place I would be parking my car other than right where it was,  would require him to bend over.

He went to another car and told the driver off for parking where they were parked.  Yet…. they weren’t in anyone’s way, and they had just loaded a disabled grandchild into the car.  (More grandparents in the same situation as us).  The gentleman behind the wheel obviously told him in a polite way that he wasn’t moving the car because there was another child to collect ….  but he would move the car once said child was collected.

Again…  I voicedGo on…  come and tell me to move my car“.  He didn’t.  Maybe he recognised a woman who was suffering the heat of being baked in a tin box, waiting for a ‘challenging situation’ to happen.  Whatever it was, he gave my car a miss.  Maybe …  next time.  🙂

Well … I’m pretty certain that there are more things which I’ve learned this week, however, my head’s a colander and things drain out of those holes, even when I try to stop them from falling out.

However … we now are in requirement of a few jokes, so without further ado, I give you . . .

THE JOKES

A woman called the airline 
customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board.

“Sure,”  said customer services, “as long as you provide your own kennel.”   They further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over.

The customer was flummoxed: 
“I’ll never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!”

❤  ❤  ❤

Q:  What do Pandas have that no other animal in the world has?

A: click and drag–>  Baby Pandas<—

❤  ❤  ❤

Q: I travel all over the world, but always stay in my corner. What am I?

A: click and drag–> A stamp.<—

❤  ❤  ❤

Q: How many seconds are there in one year?

A: click and drag-> 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.<—

❤  ❤  ❤

A recent scientific study showed that out of 2,293,618,367 people, 94% are too lazy to actually read that number.

❤  ❤  ❤

And God said to John, come forth and you shall be granted eternal life.

But John came fifth and won a toaster.

❤  ❤  ❤

and finally . . .

What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

A labracadabrador.

Thank you so much for coming and sharing a coffee with me.  I so enjoy our Friday get togethers.

I hope for you a fabulous Friday.  May the day be peace filled and enjoyable.  And may your weekend be one which leaves you feeling like you’ve actually done something with your time.  That’s always a great feeling!

Sending love, from me in my corner, to you in yours.  Be good to each other, and …  may your God go with you.

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What I’ve Learned This Week.

Hello you!  Aw I’m so thrilled to see you here, thank you so much for coming.  I could do with a cheery friend with a smiling face.  Fancy a coffee?  Tea?  You sit down at the table and I’ll pour us a drink.  Help yourself to biscuits!

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So … you’re here to find out what I’ve learned this week aren’t you?  Well… I’d better make a start then!

This week I seem to have spent ages crying over one thing or another.  Things I’ve seen on the news.  A programme about a footballer whose wife had passed on (from Cancer), leaving him and three children.  (wept several times during that programme).  I cried hot tears for the Liberian children in West Africa, and all of the children living in poverty around the world, when I watched one of our annual big fund-raisers – Comic Relief – on TV.  (I donated.  Like I wouldn’t?).   Oh … and other things had me in tears … some of them piffling little things and then others which weren’t in the least bit piffling,  but I’m not going to list and share them because if I feel like I’ve been on a roller coaster, I don’t want to put you on one as well!  eek!

I’ve learnt that just as I sit down to visit ‘my reader’  (a wonderful device on WordPress,  where all the blogs a person follows, with all the latest blog posts, are all listed out for them on one continuous page!) …  and have a look at all the blogs I follow and leave comments or likes etc….  it’s right at that VERY moment that the phone rings; or the door knocks; or it’s time for lunch/dinner/something/or other.  And I think I’m now so far behind on all the fabulous people’s blogs I follow, that I’ll never catch up ever again!  But … I’m trying.  I really am.  So bear with me if I haven’t been to your blog yet…  I’ll be getting there very soon.

I’ve learned this week ….  rather a lot about Octopuses.  (… not Octopi.  Octopuses is the preferred plural).

People of the world who watch the news (and especially those who love football)  for sure will remember that eight-tentacled seer – Paul the Octopus – who was used to predict football scores during the World Cup in 2010.  Yes?  Well for those who don’t know or would like a reminder … here’s a very short video of Paul, choosing the final ‘winner’ (in his opinion) …

During the 2010 World Cup, the cephalopod pundit, living in a German  Sea-life centre was SO accurate in his forecasting that he became an international headline.  He got nine out of ten matches in that tournament SPOT ON!  When it came to predicting a football winner, this little chap was amazing.

Now before I go any further …  I’m not a football fan.  Not even a teeny bit.  In fact I dislike it so much that I can’t be in the same room as a television which is broadcasting it.  The noise, the roar of the crowd, the wails and ‘woo hoos’,  I can’t bear it.  (Now you see why I have a craft room   🙂   lol).

Anyhoo …back to Paul..  There were, of course, people who said when Paul fished a tasty mussel out of a box which was ‘wearing’ the flag of one of the football teams who were in a forthcoming match, it was just coincidence that he picked the winner.

However they couldn’t have been more wrong.  An Australian philosopher, Peter Godfrey-Smith had detailed his own opinion of the Octopus, and upon reading it, it soon becomes clear that Paul was no ‘one-off’.   Godfrey-Smith told of one captive octopus that lived in a laboratory tank.  He said that they are very particular about their diet.  They like crab, eased fresh from the shell.

In this experiment, a researcher had been feeding captives chunks of frozen squid.  One day, as she made her way down the row of tanks, the scientist’s noticed one of the Octopuses in the tanks.

“It had not eaten its squid, but was holding it up conspicuously,” Godfrey-Smith writes.  “As she stood there, the octopus made its way slowly across the tank to the outflow pipe, watching her all the way.  Then, still watching her, it dumped the bit of squid down the drain”.

She wasn’t impressed with the food in that restaurant, that’s for sure!

Getty Images Credit

credit:  Getty Images

An octopus has no bones,  its bone-free body can be ‘re-made’ to fit the space available, and its skin –  (and this might surprise you)can see!  An octopus’ skin is rippling with little receptors that react to light and allow it to navigate its way around the depths of the ocean, changing colour as it goes.

Sadly, these fascinating, cunning, clever creatures don’t live much past the age of two.  And this is why no one ever saw Paul back on the footballers seats, prophesising who was going to win the next match.  Paul passed away shortly after the end of the football tournament in 2010 which made him famous world-wide.  A fabulous one season wonder.

More about Professor Godfrey Smith and Octopuses, along with a photograph of the man himself, can be found on the following link,  which will open in another window for you:-   Harvard Gazette – Thinking like an octopus

So .. what else did I learn? . . .

Ohhh… I learned this, about the Prime Minister’s Residence, at number 10 Downing Street,  here in the United Kingdom…

It is only since Arthur Balfour became Prime Minister in 1902 that the Prime Minister has been expected to live at No. 10.  Only one former Prime Minister has ever died there:  Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman, who resigned as Prime Minister on the 3rd April 1908 but was too ill to move and died 19 days later.  His last words were: ‘This is not the end of me.’

10 Downing Street is one of the most heavily guarded buildings in Britain. The front door cannot be opened from the outside because it has no handle, and no one can enter the building without passing through an airport-style scanner and a set of security gates manned by armed guards.  However, in the first five years after Tony Blair became Prime Minister,  37 computers,  four mobile phones,  two cameras,  a mini-disc player,  a video recorder,  four printers,  two projectors  and a  bicycle  were stolen from the building.  (Not sure what that says about who  …  Tony Blair or his staff.  [gulp])  lol

Ohh, and you’ll never guess what I learned about…. Potatoes!

Genetic testing has proved a single origin for potatoes,  – in the area of southern Peru and extreme northwestern Bolivia where they were domesticated between 7,000 and 10,000 years ago.

Potatoes were taken outside the Andes region about four centuries ago and now they are the world’s fourth-largest food crop, after maize, wheat and rice

Following centuries of selective breeding there are now about 5,000 different varieties of potatoes.

Now let’s see…  there was something else I know I learned, and really wanted to share with you … what the divil was it? .. OH …  TIME TRAVEL!  Now pay attention you lot at the back.  This is good stuff!

According to General Relativity, everything in the Universe is played out on a stage that has three dimensions of space and one of time.  This space-time is warped by the mass and energy of the Universe’s contents.  Theoretically a large enough concentration of mass or energy can distort time so much that it folds back on itself like a crumpled sheet. 

These folds were described by Kurt Gödel in 1949 and are known as ‘closed time-like curves’.  They ought, at least in theory, to allow us to revisit past moments in history by using an idea developed in 1988 by Kip Thorne and colleagues at the California Institute of Technology, who showed that tunnels through space-time (wormholes), would allow time travel by taking a shortcut from one fold to the next.

There are still plenty of obstacles to time-travelling through wormholes. Not least is the fact that the only wormholes we can possibly make with present-day technology are tiny: only subatomic particles would be small enough to travel through them. 

I learned more about Time Travel …. but I’ll save it until next week.  I don’t want to explode your brain!  (ohhh the very thought!).

So …  this is how much more educationamalised I am this week.  You know … I’m seriously beginning to wonder where I’m storing all this stuff, and how much of the other stuff is being shifted out.  What if something really important is being thrown over-board, like …  my address, or my name?  How will I know what to tell the Police if I get lost?  “What’s your name?”  I dunno!  “Where do you live?”  Don’t know that either …. but I can tell you something about potatoes which might thrill you!   Don’t laugh … it could happen!

But anyhoo …  we have now come to that time where you sit back,  get comfortable … and I slay you with some jokes.  Well … perhaps not slay you exactly …  perhaps ‘tickle your chuckle muscle’.  …  Are you ready??  Ok, lets go!

The Jokes

I went to a karaoke bar last night that didn’t play any 70’s music…
at first I was afraid,  I was petrified!

My doctor thinks I’m taking hallucinogenic drugs… how do I know?  … let’s just say a little bird told me.

My dad has a weird hobby; he collects empty bottles…  which sounds so much better than “alcoholic.”

My husband and I decided we don’t want children;  . . .  so if someone wants them, we’ll drop them off tomorrow.

What do you call a line of men waiting for a haircut? . . .   A barberque!

What do you call a train loaded with toffee?  . . .   A chew chew train.

What’s round and bad tempered?  . . .  A vicious circle.

and finally . . .

I don’t think I got the job at Microsoft  . . .    they didn’t respond to my telegram.  😀

Thank you so much for coming and having a coffee moment with me.

I hope you have a beautiful Friday, and that tomorrow doesn’t catch you by surprise  …..  (in case you hadn’t noticed … tomorrow is April Fools Day!).  May you find some more smiles to add to those you’ve just found, and I hope both today, and your whole weekend, are truly blessed.

May the winds be soft, the rain be somewhere else, and may your heart and mind work together as one.

Be good to each other and  . . .  may your God go with you.

Squidges ~

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Somethings in life are always beautiful.

I had my Ranger Melt Pot out last week aka:  The Cauldron.,  and made a few pretties with it but … well, one thing turned to another and a little memory crept into my mind of a card I remembered seeing about four or five years ago.  Once the memory had taken shape inside my mind (in other words, I remembered enough to give it a good old bash) I thought I’d have try at making the beautiful leaf I remembered.

The leaf itself is a stamped leaf, but, after cutting it out, I turned it over and using bottles of re-inkers, I set about colouring the leaf up.  The first one I made didn’t give off the feeling I was trying for.  The colours were too deep and kind of flat.  So I scrapped that one, (my motto:  If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried!)…  and began again, this time using different colours.  I knew what I was after:  A leaf coloured for all the seasons.    And this was the result:-

Somethings in life are always beautiful. 2

I was quite pleased with how it turned out.  It went from a brighter summer green, into a deep, rich, dark green, which then changed into rust and orange, which in turn changed into that fabulous autumn yellow.

I took LOADS of photographs of the leaf … and couldn’t for the life of me, get it to show the ultra thick embossing which I’d toiled over until it was perfection.  I wanted to catch the shine on the leaf so that you could see that this was something really pretty.  It looked like the most beautiful leaf captured inside glass. [sigh]  Sadly, I failed.  Nothing I did would catch the shine of what looked like glass.  So you’ll have to imagine that it’s there.

The sentiment – is partly something I read a while back, but I changed it round a little, added a line and changed a few words, and so made it more what I wanted the card to say.

Somethings in life are always beautiful. 3

In case you can’t read it, it says:

Whispering winds which scatter leaves at the end of Summer;  A gentle stroll on an Autumn Day;  The chill in the air on a Winters morning;  The chirrup of bird song which Spring brings.  Somethings in life are always beautiful.

I really enjoyed putting this card together and love the leaf.  In fact I loved making it so much that I think I’m going to make it again, only next time a little different.  If it works, I’ll share it with you.  If it doesn’t …  you may never hear another word about it.  But ..  I might share it if it fails miserably – just so that you and I can have a laugh.  LOL.

On the day I made this card,  I made some other things too – only this time with my Cauldron (Ranger Melt Pot), and I’ll share those things with you next time.

Anyhoo  . . .  HAPPY MONDAY!

Just to get the week off to a grrrrrreat start, I give you a joke in the hope of making your heart smile….

I just watched a wildlife documentary about beavers.  —  Best dam programme I’ve seen in a long time!  😀

Pass the smile around.  Share the joke.  Let’s see if we can get the whole world smiling.  We could use a little amusement now and again.

Have a truly lovely Monday.  May today be a good one.  Sending you squidges from my corner to yours….

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Things I’ve learned this Week

Act 1, scene 1:  Setting the scene:-

[The door is flung open.  She’s arrived, but not under her own steam.  She was blown through the door with the great force of a wind which took no prisoners.  And she arrived with as much grace as a cow in a china shop and making about the same amount of noise too!].

windy-day

WHOOO!!!  Flipping heck, its windy out there!  I don’t know about the weather where you are, but here in the UK (in various places dotted around Great Britain), Storm Doris has blown in and she’s making sure that her presence is felt.  Folks here have christened today (Thursday evening, as I’m writing this),  Doris Day.  HA!  Love it.  (actually giggle to myself every time I say it.  Doris Day.  Love that soooo much!).

The odd thing about the weather this week is that I went out two days before Doris Day wearing a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a lightweight jacket.  I ended up taking the jacket off and leaving it in the car because it was SO hot!

sunny-day

We have a saying here: …  ‘Come to the UK and experience Snow;   Wind;  Rain;  Hail;  Sleet;  Sunshine;  Warmth;  Heat;  and Hotter than hot.  In fact all of the weathers,   all in one day!’

This week has been a mixed week.  I seem to have done much but only have a little bit to show for it.  I made a card for a blogging friends mum, who had broken her ankle.  I have photos, and now that the card has been received the other end, I can share the piccies with you.  I’ll blog the pictures in the next couple of days.  After making the card, I decided it was about time I cleaned my craft room and moved a few things around which were now in the wrong place.  Oh.  My.  Goodness!  Nightmare In the Craft Room time!    I got about half way through and really wished I hadn’t started this task.

I’m still finishing off.  And I’ll be so glad when everything is put in its rightful place, and all the papers and trimmings have all been put back where they belong.  phew!

Anyhoo...  you haven’t come here to listen to my ramblings about cleaning up.  You’ve come to get some edumacation.  (Yes I know it’s ‘education’  … but I prefer my word. lol)

So …  shall we dive in and get educationamalised?  Strap yourself in.  Ready?  And we’re OFF!  . . .

This week …  I learned to leave a fresh from the oven pizza all alone for at least five minutes  and NOT to take a bite of a slice until 5 minutes have passed.  How did I learn this?  ….  picture the scene dear reader …

The smells from the oven were over-whelming.  A gorgeous, tummy rumbling, nose twitchy sensation, hunger pangs sort of way.  The whole house smelled of the fabulous roasted vegetables which topped the pizza, along with the two different cheeses, and the little circles of garlic butter (the size of a penny) which dotted the top of the pizza.  And the Garlic bread which was cooking at the same time.

The timer dinged, sounding out its permission to remove that pizza from the oven.  Pizza and garlic bread were removed, and salad was waiting for the finished dishes.  The pizza was cut, popped onto the plates and served up.  The smell was way too much.  I couldn’t wait …  I lifted that slice up to my lips and took a bite of that fabulous triangular bit which came from the centre of the pizza.

What happened next was something that should have been reported on the news! (Unfortunately the POTUS pushed me off the top spot so I never even got a mention!).

What I didn’t know about that Pizza was that the toppings and the cheese came from the depths of the core of a VolcanoSo hot.  SO SO SO  –  H.O.T.!!!  Not spicy hot.  Hot as in ‘let me put an iron straight out of the blacksmith’s fire into your mouth and you bite down on it for a moment or two’.  Yeah, that sort of HOT.

I burnt the roof of my mouth behind my two front teeth.  Not just a little burn.  No.  I don’t do things by halves.  When I do things I go full-out and do ’em good.  Ohhhh… the roof of my mouth was sore for days.  The ‘problem’ lasted 4/5 days before I could brush my teeth in the normal way.  In the:   “I’m thinking about sunshine and flowers.  What am I wearing today?.  Why do I have the entire cast of the four-legged members of this household all in this tiny bathroom with me, looking up at me, waiting for me to what?  Tickle them all maybe?” … way.

I had to concentrate very, v. e. r. y.  carefully as I brushed the backs of those two teeth.  None of that brushing the gums as well motion.  Noooooooo.  I had to be sure that I brushed the teeth and only the teeth.  I had experienced the pain which occurred when I brushed the normal way I do, and I didn’t want to experience that again.  Care needed to be taken.

So I learned that I shouldn’t be a pig with Pizza.  Wait ….  wait….  and wait some more  … until the pizza was cool enough before you take a bite.  Good lesson to learn.

I’ve also learned this week: That the Cadbury’s factory make 600,000 Creme eggs every 12 hours, and all those eggs, if weighed, weigh THREE TIMES HEAVIER than an elephantThe moral of this tale is …  don’t eat more than one Cadbury Creme egg a week – unless you want to become an elephant.

I also learned that the Cadbury Brothers released the first filled eggs in 1923, but the Creme Eggs we all know today were introduced to stores only in 1963.  They were initially named Fry’s Creme Eggs. But in 1971, they were rebranded as Cadbury’s Creme Eggs.

Each Creme Egg consists of 180 calories.

According to a survey done by Cadbury, there are different ways of eating the Creme Egg:  53 percent of people bite off the top, lick out the cream, then eat the chocolate;  20 percent just bite straight through; whereas six percent use their finger to scoop out the cream.

Which group do you fit into?

I also learned this week that I miss some of the funny people from our films and TV screens who have either parted company with us, or chosen to sit back and enjoy life, or just aren’t getting the jobs offered to them anymore.  People such as  Steve Martin.  Bill Murray.  John Candy.  Robin Williams (I will never stop missing him).  Leslie Nielson.  Chevy Chase.  Danny DeVito.  Peter Sellers.  Vince Vaughn.  Jane Lynch.  Dan Aykroyd.

We need to laugh more.  I’m starting a movement for more funny stuff on TV.  Lobby your TV stations and tell them that in these difficult times in which we live, we need more funny stuff on TV!

I learned this week or should that be realised?  No, we’ll stick to learned.  I learned this week that I’m totally dumbfounded at how my attitudes towards certain things have changed as I’ve got older.

Things which were, in my opinion, ‘set in stone’ when I was in my twenties are now just not important at all.  Stuff which was so crucial in my thirties, really aren’t anything I bother about now.  Things which were of great significance are now …  meh.  They can all just slide on by me now.

What is important to me now is knowing that I am loved, and that the people I love KNOW I love them.  Can see that I love them.

Our (Mr.Cobs and I) two children, who had their trying times and their ‘I’m going to pour her down the drain‘ moments …  I now look back and see that in actual fact all that worry about them when they were in their teens,  was just me being an over protective mum.  I could see where ‘the dangers’ were and so would try to head them off before daughters 1 and 2 got to them.  But … I shouldn’t have.  They needed to learn, just like we all did.  Only by learning the lesson ‘the hard way’, would they actually learn what the needed to – that being … how to deal with the problem!

So … young mums reading ... allow your children to learn about the things they’re going to need to know about in adulthood.  Even if it’s how to get the lid off the Tupperware container …  or how to sort their dirty clothes into piles of whites, darks and mixed colours!  And WHY they need to learn that.  It’s a valuable lesson – knowing not to put all the washing in the machine without sorting it out and only washing the right things with each other …. as we’ve all learned!   😀

But …  enough of my ramblings!    … I know what you’re waiting for …  the JOKES!

My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.” The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me!” His father replied, “No, your mom was talking about her side of the family.”

Q: What never asks questions but receives a lot of answers?
A: The Telephone.

Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Six.”
Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven!”
Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!”
Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!”

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Institute of Technology, “And what starting salary are you looking for?” The engineer replies, “In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.” The interviewer inquires, “Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?” The engineer sits up straight and says, “Wow! Are you kidding?” The interviewer replies, “Yeah, but you started it.”

A bank robber pulls out gun points it at the bank teller, and says, “Give me all the money or you’re geography!”   The puzzled teller replies, “Did you mean to say ‘or you’re history?’”   The robber says, “Don’t change the subject!”

and last but not least …. this little thing which I saw this week and it tickled the heck out of me  . . .

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Well that’s us done and dusted and all caught up for another Friday!  And not just any Friday either!  Today is the last Friday in this month.  Next Friday it will already be March.  We’re really racing through these months, aren’t we. Phew.  I can barely keep up.

I hope your Friday is a lovely one.  A day which passes without any problems, and no gremlins getting into the hours.

May your weekend be the weekend you’re hoping for.  May you sleep well and wake up feeling wonderful.

Sending you squidges, and hoping that life treats you well,  till we meet next time. 

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What I learned in 2016


Instead of a ‘What I’ve Learned This Week’ post (which I normally share on a Friday),   I felt it would be appropriate to make a post about some of the things I’ve learned this last year which we’ve just said goodbye to.

Some of the things life taught me during 2016 are fabulous, and some aren’t.

I’m a believer in a particular ‘thing’, which life taught me when I was in my early teens, which I call:  If something happens,  it happens For A Reason.

It might be a truly wonderful, amazing, biggest wish and want of your heart and soul.  Or it could be something not so wanted or desired.  However, what ever this ‘thing’ is, it will have been placed on your pathway for a reason, and you are meant to learn something from it.

So let’s begin the journey of discovery about what I Learned during 2016, shall we?  Are you strapped in securely?  Do you have your crash helmet secured?  Clean underwear on?  Okey Dokey, hold on tightly to the person sat next to you, because that way it’s less likely that you’ll fly off half way round the ride!

I learned last year ….  that when I finally find some moccasin slippers which fit beautifully, with good soles, and are lined with cotton inside them (because of my stupidly sensitive feet) …  I should buy two or even three pairs, because when the pair I originally chose, and have been wearing till they fell apart, I won’t be able to find any more, anywhere near as comfortable or lovely as them, and the place I bought them from changed the design and put non-cotton linings in their new design.  I’ve been looking since February of 2016 for a new pair, and so far I’ve found nothing which comes anywhere near.  I’ve bought new slippersin fact I’ve bought four pairs of different slippers since then, but none of them are anywhere near as comfortable and, to be truthful, I hate them all.

The older I’ve got, the more I’ve grown to appreciate bits of my body, in particular my feet.  Look after your feet people, because they have to last you for the rest of your life.  Buy shoes which fit.  Don’t wear heels every day – swap things around – to give your feet chance to work properly.  And don’t wear anything which is tight around the toes. It’s not brain surgery, and it’s simple to understand.  Look after your feet.

I also learned that I need to Plan Ahead.  Not for the emergency things, like a power cut and we had no electricity – because I plan for all emergencies like that.

(In fact, I plan so ‘beautifully’ (?) for that sort of emergency that if there were an actual power cut here where we live, I could give every neighbour candles and still have enough for us).

I need to stop waiting till the last moment to do some of the regular things – like make an appointment for the doctor (I wait until I’m ready to be admitted to hospital before I’ll give in and make an appointment),  – and instead of putting things off,  I need to do things there and then(!) so that they’re already done and ready for when they need to be ready.  Case in point:  This Post!

I knew I was going to do this post and I knew when I needed it done for.  And yet, here I am, on the last day of 2016, tapping away on my keyboard knowing that this post HAS to be ready to ‘go live’ in the early hours of 2017.  Why on earth didn’t I begin building this post when I sat having a rest or a coffee, or even last week?!  The answer is:  Because I’m a dimwit!  That’s why!

PLAN AHEAD WOMAN ... and stop leaving ‘it’ till the final moment!

Next!:

I learned during 2016  that Crafting is an obsession to me.  And not only is crafting itself the obsession, but crafty shopping is also an obsession.  I will go to a store with a list of (say) three or four items that I need.  However, when I hit that shop with all those lovely crafty goodies, I go batship crazy and am like a child who’s on a sugar high and been given permission to have as many things as they can stuff into a trolley within two hours.  Yes seriously.  I will sometimes catch the bored stiff eyes of ‘Cobs The Bogeyman’ (aka Mr.Cobs) as he wanders around after me (following me like a little lost puppy) asking …  “can we go now?”. 

The man should be awarded a Knighthood in the New Year Honours List (which we have here in the UK), for Services to Retail;  Excelling in the Art of Husbandry; and generally being Mr. Wonderful.  (although that last one can sometimes come into question).

“Arise Sir Cobs.” she says. [as the Queen finishes dobbing him on each shoulder with her trusty sword].

NEXT!

I’ve learned this year that …  New Years Eve is the only acceptable time to wear glitter without being mistaken for a stripper.
As a crafter this is the saddest bit of stuff I’ve ever learned in my whole life.  I’m always twinkling with glitter, even if I haven’t used any for a week.  A spell in my craft room seems to cover me in glitter, which I leave trails of behind me, wherever I roam, or go.  (Including into the loo – which tickles Mr.C – but I won’t tell you what he says about it.  Suffice to say it has something to do with storage of the twinkly stuff and my knickers)

NEXT!:

I won’t make up stories about my parents being the most amazing parents in the world.  My parents weren’t the best parents in the world,  but they were the best ‘THEY‘ could be.  They taught me many lessons.  Life Lessons about:

  • appreciating every thing I had.  From the toys that were given to me as a child, to the teachers I had at school and the lessons I learned from them.
  • How to make friends and be a friend.  ( I still have problems making friends because I’m SO painfully shy).
  • Ensuring that I knew the importance of keeping Sunday as a family day and Christmas and Easter,  and Birthdays, as special days and honour the family by spending time with them – all of them – from my parents to my Grandma & Grandad, Uncles, Aunties, Cousins etc.
  • To look at both sides of any choices which were placed in front of me.  Good-v-Bad.  To make sure that I had looked at things from every angle in order to make sure I made the right choice for me.
  • To have an opinion.  Aw heckaroonie,  I could count on my Mom to have an opinion, and to feel free to voice it –  even if I or anyone else disagreed with her, she had her opinion and would stick to it too.
  • To be willing to help.  From the age of around 12, I used to do the family weekly shopping all by myself.  My mother would be working and my father wasn’t the shopping sort of chap, so I was left a list next the kitchen sink, every Saturday morning, along with money, and I had to go all by myself to the local shopping centre, and visit the big Supermarket;  greengrocer;  butchers;  newsagent;  and possibly the pharmacy too, in order to get all the things on the list, within the money that I’d been left to buy it with.  Then bring all those groceries home – walking all the way home carrying four bags full of groceries.  This taught me a huge lesson as a child:  How to be an important part of the family.  How to manage money;  How to Budget;  How to Shop for a whole family with all their various likes and dislikes;  and …  Spend money on the right things when that was the only option open.  As an adult, when I married, I was so grateful for those shopping and money management lessons.

I learned many more lessons from my parents and I’m grateful for them.  However, a lesson they never got the chance to teach me (and I so wish they had)  was how to deal with someone, a family member in this case, who not just wounded me but broke my heart with their words,  all within about 90 seconds,  and without me getting chance to ask why?  What?  How?  When?  Who?  Why?  WHY??

My parents aren’t around now for me to talk to and ask advice from on how to deal with what happened and to share with them how it’s affected me, and over the last year I’ve wished daily that I had someone older and wiser to advise me, and to just listen.  Before now, I’ve had my mother in law to chat with, and she’s been brilliant.  But she’s getting on in age and is showing some signs of a dementia type of illness so of course I simply won’t give her a problem like this for her to listen to.

So it’s been left to me to ‘grow up’ and get to a place where I have come to a decision about what I have to do.

This whole thing happened because I’d offered this particular family member help to clean their house.  I’d offered before and they seemed to welcome the idea of this help –  things were getting on top of them and all sorts of stuff had become very difficult for them as they were suffering with depression.

Offering to help with the cleaning was the only thing I knew how to do which I thought might help in some way.  But I’d been waiting for them to tell me when they’d like me to come over – for it’s how we’d left it.  I offered, they brightened up and said yes, and said they’d let me know when.  I’d waited weeks and weeks, and wondered if perhaps they didn’t like to ask, so I offered again, and it tipped this person over the edge of reason and they simply exploded.  They shouted an awful lot of hurtful things at me, and told me that they didn’t love me, or like me, and that they didn’t want anything more to do with me. It was such a total shock because we’d always got on really well.

So … I finally learned in the last week of 2016,  that for my own sake, I have to leave this deep wound alone and move on.  Mr.Cobs has helped me see that after 15 months, if nothing has put things right after this length of time, then I HAVE to let it go and move on from it.  For the sake of my heart, and my health, I have to leave this behind me and allow my heart time to heal.

It’s difficult because I hate to see how depression is keeping this person fixed, almost like a prisoner, in one place and no longer enjoying life.  But, as Mr.Cobs has said over and over – I have to let it go.  I cannot continue to fret over this.

I’ve learned that I’m grateful for my parents being the best parents they could be, teaching me, showing me and making me aware of the things that are important.  And … I think they would have told me I realised,  probably about eight months ago,  that I HAD to just let go of this ‘thing’,  stop turning it over and over inside my heart and mind,  and instead move on.

So that’s what I’m doing.   I’m moving on Mom. ❤

Y’know …  I felt as if I just heard her say, over my left shoulder,  ‘Good girl.’

*I tell you none of this for sympathy …  and I want none.   I’m simply sharing what I’ve learned last year, and this was a really BIG learn for me.

OK… moving on:  NEXT!

I learned, during 2016, that it takes me two months to learn to write the new year numbers down on anything that I need to write it down on.  So I’m going to try harder with 2017!

NEXT!

I learned all over again in 2016, how much I enjoy writing posts for this blog.  I’ve ‘met’ so many wonderful people via the blog and I cannot begin to tell you how enriching it is to know you all.  YOU reading this now.  YOU enrich my life by being in it.  So I take this opportunity to thank you for being who you are.  You’re truly amazing.  (And boy oh boy, you’re such a blessing!)

NEXT:

I’ve learned how much I adore the simple jokes in life.  Complicated jokes are great … but sometimes they can be a bit too clever and they make my brain hurt trying to keep up with them.  But the simple, almost childlike jokes … aw, they are the jaw achers which I adore.  I shall attempt to remember to add a small handful at the end of this ‘ream of internet paper’.

NEXT!

I’ve learned the importance of an afternoon snack. 4pm (ish) seems to be the point at which my sugar levels drop to a low and I will either fall asleep in my chair or take myself off to bed for a nap.  However … if I have something snackwise, at around 4pm, then I’m good to go for the rest of the day.  Have a snack!

And finally….

I’ve learned the importance of not hitting your knee on a substantial coffee table, made of 2″thick pine and made in such a way that a family of four could live in it in an emergency.  Actually … I learnt this lesson on the closing moments of 2016 … so only just, and the swear words are still bouncing off the walls of my brain!  Grrrrr!  Gosh, that knee hurts now, and it’s really, really hot to touch and swollen too!

OK…  I know you’ve been waiting for this part ….  here come the jokes:

On New Year’s Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living. Well, it was kind of embarrassing. Because,  as the clock struck, the bartender was almost crushed to death.
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What’s the difference between a ‘hippo’ and a ‘Zippo’?
 . . . . . .  One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter
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Two Clowns divorce.  A Custardy battle follows.
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Question for you …  Why is the winner of the Miss Universe contest always from earth?
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An annoying person told me “People have 2 Ears and 1 mouth, so they should listen more than they speak.”

I replied “People also have 1 mouth and 2 legs, so maybe you should shut up and go away.”

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In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth. After that, everything else was ‘Made in China’.

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WomenA species that loathes you for asking their age,but will torture you forever if you forget their birthday.

What is red and bad for your teeth?  . . .   A brick!

Isn’t it scary that doctors call what they do “practice”?

Love means nothing to a tennis player.

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Who.
Who who?
What are you? An owl?

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Smell map
Smell map who?
If you’re not giggling by now,  say it out loud.  If you’re still not giggling after that then click and hold the click over this —>“Smell map who?”  sounds like  ‘Smell my poo’ when said out loud<—

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Doris.
Doris who?
Doris locked that’s why I’m knocking.

Knock, Knock
Who’s there?
Hatch
Hatch who?
Bless you and cover your mouth next time.

Knock, Knock
Who’s there?
Spell.
Spell who?
OK, W. H. O.

Knock, Knock
Who’s there?
Mikey.
Mikey who?
Mikey doesn’t fit in the keyhole

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
I eat map.
I eat map who?
Oh yuk!   That’s disgusting!  (you might have to say it out loud if you haven’t got it yet).

And finally …..

Wife texts husband: Where are you? Why aren’t you home yet?

Husband texts back: Love, do you remember the jewellery shop on Regent Street where you saw a diamond necklace and fell in love with it and I couldn’t afford it then, but I said ‘I will get it one day for you’?

Wife replies (all excited): Yes I do, I do.

Husband texts back to her: I am in the pub just next door to that.

fnar fnar!

Well I guess that there’s only one thing left for me to do now and that’s this (It’s only 34 seconds long):-

 

Remember you can reset your resolutions on January 14th (Orthodox New Year) and February 8th (Chinese New Year). After that, even I can’t help you.
I personally have only one resolution. To rediscover the difference between wants and needs. May I have all I need and want all I have.
May love, peace and harmony be yours in 2017, and my greatest wish for you is for contentment to be yours.  For when you have contentment, you then have everything you could possibly want.  Happy New Year to you!

With love ~

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Craft Living with Anne and Malcolm – 2

We first met Anne and Malcolm a few weeks ago (if you missed the first post you can find it HERE), and now they’re back again for another visit, to share with us all their unique observations on Life living with a Crafter via the use of photographs.

For those who haven’t ‘met’  Anne and Malcolm,  then  . . .  Crafters, Ladies and Gentlemen … May I introduce you to Malcolm and Anne. A glimpse into the exciting world of Crafters and their spouses.   

(Anne and Malcolm exist solely inside my imagination and for the purpose of…) . . . .

THE  COBWEB  CATALOGUE

of a Living  (in my imaginationCrafter & Spouse

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Malcolm loved that Anne was so happy in the craft room he’d ‘built’ for her, but one thing didn’t go down well with him at all.  The Voodoo Dolly strapped to the big star.  He wished with all his heart that she’d part company with that, because it gave him the heebie-jeebies and he didn’t like to go into the craftroom to get any of his cooking spices which Anne insisted should be in her craft room.  It made him wonder exactly what sort of ‘craft’ Anne was practising!

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the-sewing-room-2

Anne had dropped (very) heavy hints to Malcolm, and even left brochures around the house  in the hope he’d get the idea about what she dearly wanted as a Birthday gift this year.  But on her Birthday, all he’d bought her was a wall mounted thingy-ma-jiggy-me-bob on which to store all her cotton reels,  and he still hadn’t noticed the lack of a sewing machine in her Sewing Room!

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naughty-basket-and-glass-jar-jails-3

Anne was far happier now that she’d finally got
a ‘Naughty Basket’ for the fabrics which were
misbehaving,  and two Glass Jail Jars for those really
BAD fabrics who were the real trouble makers in
the bunch!  She was determined to teach them
a lesson!

~~~~~~

hastily-packed-suitcases-4

Back from their shopping trip, Malcolm took Anne’s new blue basket, filled with all the ribbons she’d bought that morning, down to her basement craft room.  That’s when he noticed the hastily packed suitcases under her fabric cutting desk.   The neighbours could hear that trouble was brewing in  ‘Chez Malcanne’,   as Malcolm climbed the stairs from the basement, two at a time, shouting:  “Anne!  ANNE!!”    with a rather cross tone to his voice.

~~~~~~~~

clean-up-5

While Anne was away visiting her mother for a couple of days, Malcolm had planned to clean up her crafting room as a surprise for her upon her return.  He thought she’d love how clean and tidy it was now, and also thought she’d adore all the storage boxes with all their little drawers which he’d sorted her things into, and then spent four hours writing little sticky labels out for each drawer.  Sadly, we crafters among us know exactly what was going to happen the minute she stepped inside that door.  She would look around that room with horror mounting and registering on her face.  It was going to take her years to find all her lovely things – which despite what he might have thought,   were all in their correct places (for her) and she prided herself on knowing that she could put her hand on ANYTHING she required because she’d known exactly where it all was!  But not any longer!    Malcolm was going to be TOAST!

~~~~~~~~~

not-so-much-a-craft-room-as-a-breeding-programme-6

One corner of Anne’s Stitch, Knit and Sew Crafting Room was dedicated to what Anne affectionately called her ‘woolly life‘.  However,  Malcolm suspected that this corner had nothing to do with crafting, and instead believed it was a secret Breeding Programme.  The mound seemed to increase weekly, and yet Anne always laughed and denied it when he suggested to her that she’d been out buying more wool again.

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Well,  we’ve turned over few more pages of the ‘COBWEB CATALOGUE of life with a Crafter  & Spouse’,  for a bit of Wednesday afternoon fun.  I hope they’ve raised a few smiles, a smattering of gentle laughs,  or even modicum of cheer.

Have a truly blessed rest of your day.

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The photos chosen for this post are randomly chosen and found on the internet, so publicly available.   I sadly don’t know who the photos belong to, so if you are the owner of any of them, please drop me a comment detailing which photo is yours, and giving me a link to the original posting of it, and  I’ll be thrilled to credit you to the photo.

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