Chocolate – The Art of Cobwebs

What I Learned This Week

Hello!! Aw it’s lovely to see you, thanks so much for coming for a visit. Coffee? Tea? Help yourself to biscuits (that’s ‘cookies’ for my USA friends).

Well . . . I’ll start with my confession … I was a very naughty girl one evening this week … I ate a bar of Fry’s Chocolate Cream. All to myself, and I didn’t share any of it either. I’m presuming that you know what a Fry’s Chocolate Cream is? I know they do sell them in the USA, and various other places around the globe. But … just in case, here’s a photo of one:

… As I was eating this bar I became aware of my puzzler working overtime. I recalled that Fry’s Chocolate Cream came in other flavours too, which I hadn’t realised had disappeared from the shelves here in the UK. Orange – which I was a little indifferent about anyway, but it would be rather nice to taste it again now that I’ve grown up (well, in body but my mind … aw lets’ not go there eh?), and PEPPERMINT! Oooo now that one was rather a treat.

My mum used to have a Fry’s bar once a week. Normally towards the weekend. She only ever allowed herself one and sometimes, if I’d been an especially good girl, she would share a piece with me. And this is how I came to love them too. My mum was brilliant about it though. She could make a bar of this last her for days on end! Always a mystery to me, how on earth she did this. lol

However, in this looking back at Fry’s, suddenly came a quiet little voice saying … “oy, over here….. look over here!” And there, in a little dusty corner of my mind, was another Fry’s Chocolate Cream bar…

Anyone remember the 5 different flavours of the 5 Centre bar? It wasn’t a particular favourite of mine. All the different centres in one bar, all bunched up against each other, aw it made it just wrong somehow. If I was given one of these though … it would last me for days, as I could only eat one section and then had to leave it for hours and hours, until I could face another section. lol. So, a great dietary aid when I come to think of it.

This then sent me on a trip down Chocolate Memory Lane … GALAXY COUNTERS…. anyone remember those? For what reason they stopped making those is lost in time, but they were just fabulous. You can still get them I understand, but only in packets of Revels. I liked Galaxy Counters because you could let them sit on your tongue, and slowly melt away into gorgeousness. Mmmmmm. Galaxy chocolate is such lovely, smooth stuff.

Anyone else remember when Matchmakers came in their original box?

I somehow liked them more in their original box than in the double sized boxes they come in today. They seemed more of a treat in the slim box.

Anyone remember the Cadbury’s Milk Tray Bar? The box of chocolates only in a bar?

So that you can be reminded what was inside this amazing bar of chocolates ….

Funny thing is ... I don’t remember Coconut being spelt like it is on that wrap?! I do wonder why they stopped making that bar as it seemed to be so popular.

And … finally ... Mackintosh’s Mint Cracknel. Oh you HAVE to remember Mint Cracknel! Although I liked it … I had a fear of it. Let me remind you of what it looked like:

Remember it now? I was terrified that one of those shards of mint cracknel would get into my throat, puncture my throat and then I’d die a strange minty perfumed death, and no one would know why because the minute those minty shards got wet (from the saliva in your mouth) they totally melted away to nothing and left a fabulous minty taste in your mouth. But … boy they scurred me! lol

OK.. moving along now. May I just take this moment to give the world a weather reminder:

January brings the snow;

Makes our feet and fingers glow.

February brings the rain,

Thaws the frozen ponds again.

March brings breezes, loud and shrill,

Stirs the dancing daffodil.

~~~ 🌹 ~~~

…….

STIRS the dancing daffodil. S-T-I-R-S .. Stirs the dancing daffodil. It doesn’t say KNOCK SEVEN SORTS OF you know what OUT OF MY DAFFODILS!!!

Madam Weather … kindly remember what you’re supposed to be doing at this time of the year and STOP MAKING UP YOUR OWN RULES! My garden looks like a sodden graveyard of daffodils which have been slayed by some sort of monster who doesn’t leave visible footprints, but instead branches blown off trees, a ton of dried up leaves all congregated at my door, trying to block my entry into my own home and a howling gale mixed with buckets of rain when I get out of the car, which leaves my time this morning of primping and curling my hair a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME! [stamps foot]

. . .

So just stop it weather, and follow the instructions in the poem! OK?!!! Ok!

. . .

So … let’s get onto what I learnt this week….

. . . .

This week I learned that there are approximately 5,000 species of mammals alive in the world, today.

I learnt that the difference between a Mammal and an Animal is that a Mammal can feed its young by producing its own milk. This also applies to Monotremes, such as the Duck-billed Platypus, which lays eggs and produces milk – and therefore it’s the only animal that can make its own custard.

. . . . . [. . . . waits for the penny to drop . . . . waits a little longer while the reader reads that last sentence again so that is dislodges that penny and … ohhhh there you go! There’s the laugh!]. Moving swiftly on . . .

I learned that performing daily chores can use up more calories than winning gold medals. Yes seriously.

Usain Bolt needed to run for a total of just under 30 seconds over three rounds to secure his Olympic title, shedding less than 30 kcal (though this does not include calories burned during training or after the race, when athletes’ metabolic rates ramp up). You lose more than that sitting through a 15-minute meeting.

I also learned that extremely sensitive hearing is called ‘hyperacusis’. Sufferers can find normal levels of sound intolerably loud.

Mr.Cobs would (if I ever took the time to breathe in when I’m talking) take the opportunity to tell you that I suffer with this. Which is possibly correct, for I do have sensitive hearing. However I would also remind himself that he talks way too loud and that’s why I’m forever saying “Will you stop shouting. I’m sat arms length from you!” …. at which point he lowers his voice …. and then ….. (get this) … he then repeats what he said in a quieter voice, in case I didn’t HEAR IT THE FIRST TIME WHEN HE WAS SHOUTING IT!. Why is this? Why? .. [shakes head and pulls her puzzlement face in bewilderment]

I kid ye not reader. He really, honestly, truly, cross my heart, really does do this.

OOOhh… nearly forgot this one… I learned:- The most difficult tongue-twister in English is ‘pad kid poured curd pulled cod’. Go on … give it a few goes. It really is a tongue-twister – even when you’ve got it written down in front of you. I could only say it when I read it quite slowish. I managed it once, then tried to get faster and it all fell to pieces. lol.

Well now look … I’ve talked and talked and kept you reading when all you wanted to do was dive into some funnies … so, because you know I love you dearly, I shall finish imparting my wisdom and instead turn my hand to making you laugh and/or smile. Ready? OK.. let’s go!

A friend told me this joke this week:

Q: Is Google male or female? …. A: Female, because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. BUT … I answered back that no, it was male, because it thought it knew better than you so tried to rush you on because you’d interrupted his game playing on the X-Box.

~~~~~~~

Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym? . . . . A: To get better buns!

. . . . I have a stepladder. I never knew my real ladder.

. . . .

Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower?
A: The bride and all her guests, apparently

. . . .

Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?

A. “How do you breathe through something so small?”

. . . .

Q: What type of sandals do frogs wear?
A: Open-toad!

. . . .

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels

. . . .and finally ….

. . . . If tomatoes are a fruit, – then (in that case) isn’t Ketchup a smoothie?

. . . .

We made it to the end of the first week in March, despite the weather trying to stop us! It’s been pretty cold here in the UK, and I’m hoping that the weather improves a tad as we move into next week. I’m not asking for unseasonal temperatures, just weather which makes working in the garden a possibility.

. . . .

What about you in your corner of the world? What’s the weather doing there where you are?

. . . .

Despite the weather, it’s been a nice week and I’ve quite enjoyed being in the house with Mr.Cobs, doing nothing in particular.

. . . .

But do tell me what you’ve been up to this week. I’d love to hear about what’s going on in your world.

. . . .

In the meantime … I send you my best wishes and hope that your weekend is peace filled, warm and happy. May contentment find you, and may you recognise it as a friend. For where you have contentment, everything else will just fall into place and life will be good.

. . . .

Have a blessed rest of your day, followed by a truly blessed weekend.

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Things I’ve Learned this Week

Well, looky here! It’s Friday again, and we all know what Friday means …. it means that you come to school to learn all the valuable life gems that I’ve learned this week (whether I wanted to or not) so that you don’t have to! (It’s my personal kindness to society. I learn all this stuff and just tell you about it so that you’re warned!). lol

So … what have I learned this week?

I’ve learned: That I shouldn’t eat Magnum Ice Creams . . because …

. . . . the Gods of Ice Cream and Chocolate all get together and have an absolutely bally hilarious time laughing at me as tiny bits of the chocolate covering drop off the ice cream lolly, straight onto my top; my decolletage; or, if they manage to actually get past my chest, straight onto my lap. And … sometimes all three! I end up looking like I can’t feed myself and need a carer to assist!

I’ve learned: That a silhouette isn’t just the title of an image of a person, or dog, tree, building etc., that you can only see in a solid colour – normally black, grey or brown (but I’ve seen them in other colours).

In actual fact Silhouette is the name of a French Minister of Finance, way back in the 1700’s.

Etienne de Silhouette (French Minister of Finance) put up taxes massively for the French upper classes, during the seven years war. Because of these high taxes, paintings (a favourite of the upper classes) were way too costly (and there were no cameras around during that time – surprising as that might sound), so they came up with a very cost-effective way to have ‘pictures’ of their loved ones, family, friends and pets. They had picture cut outs of them instead of paying a ludicrous amount for a painting.

Having a talented artist cut out your daughter/son, dog, mother etc, out of paper, was an exceptionally cheap way of getting around the taxes put on paintings.

So because of this ‘high tax’ time in France, anything that could be made cheaply was always linked to Etienne de Silhouette, however the little paper cut outs have retained the name Silhouette to this day and it’s known all around the world.

The final thing I’ve learned this week . . . is that when I see something (craft related) which I instantly fall in love with, but I tell myself that the set is too expensive; – and besides which: what if I don’t use them enough to get my monies worth out of them?; – and … well, surely I have enough things in my amazing craft room that I really shouldn’t be buying anymore ?. . . .

I’ve learnt that I should bally well ignore myself and my guilt conscience and purchase the very things I so desperately want when they’re available – and before they’ve sold out. The promised new supply of said things (I was notified by the craft store) would be here in … July. No .. August. No ..September … and then when the date in September rolls around and you call the company up, with your bank card clutched in your grubby little fist … the company say that “the suppliers are really messing around and only half of the stock has turned up from over-seas!” … AND THE MOST WANTED THINGS OUT OF ALL THE THINGS I WAS GOING TO BUY, ISN’T EVEN BEING MADE AT THE MOMENT BY COUTURE CREATIONS (in Australia) YES, STAND UP AND OWN THE SHAME THAT COMPANY!

And the craft store where I was going to buy them from has said that they’re actually not really very sure if the company (Couture Creations) will even put them through for making them again as they were originally out (in Aus) in the very early part of this year so to Cout.Crea., they’re kind of ‘old stock’ and they may be moving on to a new range now. (These products [dies, papers, embossing folders, chipboard decorations etc] only came to the UK around the early part of June, and then at that time they were only available from Create & Craft.)

I nearly cried when I got off the phone today. It made me cross and miserable, I think simply because I was getting so excited as the day drew nearer for me to be able to buy them. I’m now faced with either doing without; buying them from an eBay seller in Australia (at a higher price and then add the postal charges for posting to the UK); or … buying a set of these from Create and Craft at a higher price than I could have paid if I’d just have bought a whole bloomin’ lot at the beginning when they were on a Special Offer price. [sigh]

Ahh [sigh] we live and learn, we live and learn. Time for more chocolate I think.

Well … I don’t know about you, but I’ve had trouble with my days all week. I thought Tuesday was Monday – all day I kept saying that it was Monday. I’d gone back a day!

But then … I thought Wednesday was Thursday – so I went forward a day.

And yesterday I thought Thursday was today, Friday, and I began to panic that I hadn’t got various things done and had run out of time!

Something is wrong with the wiring in my brain. It’s shorting somewhere. Either that … or I’m a dope. Hmmmm … [thinks for a moment . . . .] Yes, I agree with you. I’m definitely a dope. Hang on, hang on a cotton pickin’ minute … what’s all this talk about a BRAIN? I’m getting rather ahead of myself here, aren’t I?! I don’t have ‘a brain’. I have … A BRAIN CELL. That, dear reader, is a very different thing altogether!

Ahhh, life could be so much more simple if I just listened to my brain cell. But I insist on confusing it and making it feel like I expect more from it. Poor New Ron.

Aw look … Have a wonderful weekend my friends. If trouble comes a calling, don’t answer the door. Decide to have a great day, each morning you wake up. It’s as simple as that. Two choices. Decide or have: A) a good day. – or – B) a bad day. I know which one I’m going to choose. … well, New Ron does. lol

Sending my grandest of squidges to you. Be nice to each other.

Friday Post: Things I’ve Learned this Week

Friday has come around all too quickly in Cobweb Towers. Y’ know . . . I used to laugh at my Grandma when she said (in her Lancashire accent) “Eee, the days fly past so quick! I wake up on a Monday and by the time I’ve had a cup of tea, it’s Friday!”.

Then as my Mother grew older, she too would say similar things, and I told her that she’d turned into Grandma!

And now … I’m saying those same things too. Where has the time gone? When did I grow ‘old’? I didn’t notice time slipping by. Was I too busy? What on earth was I doing which made me not notice that I was growing older? I used to laugh about the Grey Hair – I actually even liked it. It added hi-lights to my dark hair. But … I swear I’m not actually as old as my birth certificate says … because I still feel like a child. My inner child is there in everything I do or say. Very much in evidence. When someone is not nice to me, I still cry like a child would. I have a belief that everyone surely is nice . . . (and yet … the news tells me a totally different story!).

I used to laugh about me saying things my mother used to say, and I’d tell our two girls: “Oh my goodness I think I’ve swallowed Nanny! She’s just popped out of my mouth!” … and they’d laugh their funny, chuckling, little girl laughs.

However … I noticed a few years ago that both of my beautiful daughters had begun to have my sayings ‘pop’ out of their own mouths, and I’d laugh as I told them to “be careful girls …. you’re turning into your mother, and you really don’t want that to happen!”. And yet, it’s the funniest thing – because, for some strange reason that I really can’t fathom, they seem to always be just a tiny bit pleased that they’re hearing me ‘pop’ out of their mouths. They hear themselves saying the very things I used to say to them when they were growing up and they appear to like it. It kind of tickles them in some odd way. [shakes head and chuckles to self].

Anyhoo …

As I said, it’s Friday and we all know what that means … it means that I’m sharing with you the things I learned this week. So … are you ready? Here goes:-

I learned that the average person falls asleep in 7 minutes. I learned from this that I’m not an average person. [sigh] It takes me about an hour, sometimes two and occasionally more than that, to fall asleep. Don’t feel sorry for me, it’s just me. Do these people who fall asleep in 7 minutes have nothing they need to think about?
I’ve learned that the average chocolate bar has …. [get ready for this one. . .] . . . 8 insect legs in it. Oh. My. Stars! Never has anything been such a wonderful dietary aid.
The Electric Chair was invented by a Dentist called Alfred P. Southwick.. (Still want to go and get your teeth looked at in that nice comfy dentists chair this week?) 🙂 Mr. Southwick was present on August the 6th, 1890 when a gentleman by the name of William Kemmler was executed by electrocution. It was reported that Mr. Southwick said: “There is the culmination of ten years work and study. We live in a higher civilization from this day.”
A cat has 32 YES – THIRTY TWO – muscles in each ear!!! AND … I also learned that that fold of skin forming a little pouch on the lower part of a cats ear has a name! It’s call Henry’s Pocket! Isn’t that just the sweetest thing?! lol.
I’ve learned that some Doctors are complete and utter nincompoops. I shall say no more on this subject, you’ll just have to believe me.
And finally we end where we begun; on the subject of sleeping: … I read this on the internet somewhere this week, and it’s been one of those things which has been on a loop inside my head. So in the spirit of sharing and with a nod to the Olympics … I hand the baton to you!

And there you have it. Things I’ve learned this week. Not entirely sure what I’m going to do with these ‘facts’ but at least I’m full of … what? … knowledge? … things? …. stuff? …. well… I’m full of something and it’s not what Mr. Cobs just suggested!! tsk tsk. He’ll be spending five minutes on the naughty seat for that little bit of bad behaviour. If he carries on, I’ll phone his mother, THEN he’ll know what trouble looks like! 🙂 Mrs. Cobs Snr. loves me. She tells me so every time I speak to her. (I think she’s just grateful that someone took ‘himself’ off her hands!) fnar fnar.

So … Is there anything you’ve learned this week? Maybe some fun stuff? Or … have you:- Done stuff? Bought stuff? Won stuff? Anything? I’ll pour the coffee … you tell me about it, and we’ll share a laugh or two between us.

Have a wonderful weekend my friends. Remember to make a memory as you go about your days.