What I’ve Learned this Week

Hello  🙂   Happy Friday!

Well what a lovely week it’s been.  I seem to have done a lot and achieved very little to show for it.  But I’ve really enjoyed it, and that, after all, is what life is supposed to be about.  Enjoying it.

The weather, here in the south of England, has been a bit chilly, and night-time get’s really rather cold.  I’ve been getting Mr.Cobs to turn the heating up by around 9pm of a night-time, just to keep the temperature at ‘toasty’.  Mr. Cobs has to control the heating because I cannot understand our heating control box thingy-ma-jig.  I always end up pressing the wrong button, or combination of buttons.

So …. What have I learned this week?  Well I thought I hadn’t really learned anything at all until I got thinking about it ….  check this little list out:-

I learned that probably the worst thing a woman can hear when she’s wearing a bikini is:   “Good for you!”

I learned that Bifocals are God’s way of saying, “Keep your chin up.”

I also learned about  Honest Brand Slogans  and how these should become ‘Law’ – such as:

Hallmark:   “When you care enough to give a card mass-produced by 
a corporation.”

Ritz crackers: “Tiny, edible plates.”

Gillette:  “We’re just going to keep adding blades.”

ChapStick “You’ll misplace it before the tube’s empty.”  (ain’t THAT one the truth!)

Hot Pockets:   “Every bite is a different temperature.”

I was reminded that I learned many years ago  when Daughter No.1 was 15/16 years old  that the four most beautiful words in our common language are:-  “
I told you so”.

I finally found out what Instagram is actually all about.    It’s ‘Twitter’ for people who go outside.  Ha!

I still haven’t learned why my dog always barks like crazy and races to the door, all the time she’s running round in circles,  when someone knocks on the door.  She get’s SO excited, and yet  . . .  it’s hardly ever for her!

I learned that I’m more gullible than even I thought I was.  . . .   I heard, via a TV programme, that the Welsh word for microwave is popty ping.   So … before I added it to the list of things I’d learned this week I asked Mr.Google if this was true.  The very first result which came up said it was true.  So I shared the information with Mr.Cobs because I thought this was such fun.  Popty Ping.  Say it out loud.  It’s kind of ticklish!

HOWEVER . . .  I didn’t quite trust the first answer  so did a little more digging around on Google and discovered that  ‘popty ping’  is a made up word.  The Welsh word for microwave is actually:- meicrodon(And no, it doesn’t mean ‘tiny gangster’. lol).  Shame … I rather liked popty ping.  It was such a perfect description!

And finally …  I learned:  Women’s tears contain pheromones that lower the testosterone of nearby men.  Would you believe it?  When us gals shed a few tears, it makes the men nearest to us go all soft and gentle.  From this I deduce that we should cry more often.  Especially so when we want to buy ourselves a new pair of expensive shoes or maybe a handbag!

Well, I know why some of you are here.  You just want some Jokes to spread happiness around the world this beautiful Friday.  Ok … gird your loinshere are the Jokes:-

Q.  What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?  ….A.  Polaroids

Q.  Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?  …  A.  Because it’s a little meteor.

Q.  What did the ghost say to the bee?  …  A. BOO-BEE

Q.  Why didn’t the melons get married?  …  A.   Because they cantaloupe!

and finally ….

Q.  What do you get when you cross a tyrannosaurus rex with fireworks?  …  A.  DINO-MITE!

Well that’s another week which we’ve put to bed and noted it in our diaries.  Have you learned anything this week?  Been somewhere exciting?  Done something amazing?  Do share your story.  I love to read about what’s going on in your corner!

Anyhoo ... all that’s left for me to do is wish for you a truly lovely weekend.  May the weather be kind, may your heart be happy, and, where ever you are or where ever you go this weekend, may your God go with you.

Have a blessed weekend my beautiful friend,  ~



Author: The Art of Cobwebs - aka:- thecobweboriumemporium

Hello. I'm 'Cobwebs'. I live in a wee little cottage in the South of England, aptly called Cobweb Cottage. This little dwelling really is a cobweb factory. Not inside (well, occasionally) - but outside - flipping heck! This information should give you a clue as to why my blog is called The Art of Cobwebs aka: The Cobweborium Emporium. I've been arty and crafty from a very young age, and although my crafts have sometimes turned a corner and taken me in another direction, I've always crafted in some way, shape or form. One day, in the blink of an eye, life changed somewhat for me and the consequences were many. I had to find a new way of being 'artistic'. Card making; scrap-booking; producing ATC's and ACEO's; needle felting; Polymer clay; painting- but in a more relaxed style than I had before, and sewing, - are all things which I visit, as and when life allows. I've fairy recently become a Textile Artist and am enjoying this new creative outlet very much as it offers me so much scope for letting my imagination run through a grassy field and feel the wind in my hair - (mentally, of course). I love to create. To make things. I truthfully believe that the best gifts in the world are those in which you've given your time, rather than your cash. Thank you so much for visiting. Please visit my blog (link below) and have a look around. I'm sure you'll find something to enjoy, even if it's only a handful of jokes! (yes, seriously - there really are jokes!) Wishing you a truly blessed rest of your day! ~ Cobs. <3

49 thoughts on “What I’ve Learned this Week”

    1. Hello Anne.
      Hmm.. yes, I think you’re right. We do need to use Popty Ping for something. It’s far too delicious to be left on the shelf.

      I’m going to have to give this some thought. At the moment, inside my head, it sounds like something the BFG would say. LOL
      (BFG = Big Friendly Giant. One of many children’s books written by British novelist Roald Dahl).

      I shall put on my thinking cap and see if my befuddled brain can come up with the right thing. However … my money is on you. I think you’ll come up with the answer before I manage to do because my brain is apparently having the day off today! LOL
      Sending love and squidges your way, Anne. ~ Cob.s x


        1. OOooo… Poppity Ping. Now that’s a variation on a theme … *think Cobs, THINK!*

          Well Mr.Cobs and I have gone through all the things which we can think of which make a noise in the microwave as they ‘cook’, and have both agreed that you’ve hit the nail on the head. Microwave Popcorn is the very thing!

          Therefore, from here-on, Microwave Popcorn will be known as Poppity Ping.

          Tah Dahhhhhh. 😀

          And … a microwaved baked potato will be known as: Phutt-sssz Ping. LOL (that’s one Cobs Snr and I came up with.lol)

          Sending giggles and lots of smiles, along with oodles of love ~ Cobs. x


  1. You are at the top of your game on this one Mrs. Cobs. Love love love the bikini one. Also read and laughed at the Hallmark etc on section with the husband. We both also found the Polaroid joke to be one of our favorites.
    Hmmmm I will have to reflect on what I learned this week. I spent a couple days with my husband in the hospital as he had a hip replaced. I guess I learned that those nurses (wonderful as they are) never let a body sleep during the night. They keep poking, prodding and waking the patient. Always wondered how someone is supposed to get better without sleep. Now I am learning how to be patient and take care of the patient at home!!! All is going wonderfully :).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ohhhhhh Chicken! Oh you and Mr.Chicken are having a time of it right now.
      Because I’m so behind on keeping up with blog posts I didn’t know about Mr.Chick having to have this operation.
      I feel dreadful about this. Forgive me. Had I known I’d have been on the big prayer intercom to God, asking for His help.
      But … I think He probably had his ear filled up with prayers for Mr.Chicken, so I will get on the other end of things and give thanks.

      I’m thrilled he’s home, and so quickly too! I remember that it used to be weeks in hospital for a hip replacement. It’s so amazing that things have moved on and patients can now be allowed home far more quickly. Personally, I think people recover better at home. Or maybe that’s just me, because I cannot abide being in hospital. I cry buckets and beg to be allowed to come home. (such a blubber baby!)

      So happy to hear that things are well and moving along nicely there.
      Sending you lots love, plenty of squidges and of course, healing thoughts ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Don’t feel bad! I only told you and a few others just yesterday. Mr. Chicken has a thing about people knowing he is been hospitalized. I am not sure why? He had his other one done last August and swore me to web secrecy lol.
        He is doing wonderfully.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. HA HA HA! Polaroids..ahh brilliant! Meicrodon…loved that too, tiny gangster!! Yes, I thought that “popty ping” sounded a little too “made-up”…and I’m glad you Googled it…my son will be disappointed though!
    Great way to start a Friday, thank you for the laughs 🙂 I am now going to brush the very faint dusting of snow off the path and steps…still cold but I can deal with a millimetre of snow-just! Lots of love :)xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello lovely Samantha.
      I was disappointed about the Popty Ping, I have to admit. It was just so delicious to say it. lol.
      Glad you got a few giggles from the post.

      We have no snow here where we are in the South of England (thankfully), but it’s bloomin’ freeeeeeezing cold here. I just had to answer the door to my parcel delivery lady, and the gust of wind which whooooooshed in through the door totally took my breath away!

      I shall be so glad when Spring is delivered.

      Thrilled you got a laugh and some smiles from this Friday post – I’ve hit the right spot! 🙂
      Sending squidges to your corner from mine ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Good evening 🙂 just catching up with comments now…told my son your jokes and got very rewarding laughs today LOL! It’s freezing here too…a few feeble handfuls of snow were thrown from the sky while I was out, but in the Midlands a lot of it just seems to blow straight over, thank goodness. I even saw some crocuses (croci?) today too 🙂
        Have a wonderful weekend, lots of love xxx

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Hello Samantha. Happy Friday!
          Aww, I’m thrilled to little bits that your son gets a little tickle from my jokes. I’m not sure how old he is, but we’re obviously on the same wave length with regard to the stuff we find funny.

          The evenings here in the South get reeeeealy cold during the evenings and cor flipping heck, it plays havoc with my knees, wrists and elbows! I think someone needs to invent some sort of hot water bottle which you climb into and wear. Like a pair of jammies …. only pockets of hot water.

          That sounds so easy. Why hasn’t someone already thought of that???

          You’ve seen crocus’s/crocuses/croci … a few crocus flowers (yeah that’ll do!) today? Aww .. such sweet flowers. They’re like little smiles from the earth. Popping up to say Hi! Beautiful.

          Thank you so much for popping by Samantha. It’s fabulous spending a little time with you and having a chat.
          Have a great weekend.
          Sending oodles of love and warm squidges ~ Cobs. x ❤

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Good Saturday morning…:)
            It’s still doing its best to snow…the ground looks like it’s been covered by a layer of Slush Puppy…
            My son is 17 actually and off to university soon-at least he’ll have some decent jokes to tell his friends!
            And, in town yesterday I saw an L-shaped hot water bottle, specifically designed to put on your neck and shoulder..you could be onto something there!
            Have a wonderful Saturday-stay warm, lots of love xxx

            Liked by 1 person

            1. You simply cannot be old enough to have a son who’s old enough to go off to uni!

              It’s trying to snow down here right now Samantha! Verrrrrry teeny tiny snowflakes. Delicate little things. I’m hoping they stay that way and that the earth warms up, just enough even, to melt them so that they don’t get the chance to settle. But my goodness, it’s cold!

              Sending squidges ~ Cobs. x

              Liked by 1 person

              1. Ha ha ha 🙂 oh yes I am! You’re very kind 🙂 Just heard the weather forecast actually, it’s set to be like this for another couple of days yet…but I’m bored of it now. Sunshine and warmth please…lots of love xx

                Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi, sorry I haven’t been around – life stuff. Love the slogans idea. I have wondered before just how many more blades could be added to a razor. I will also be curious if anyone says they are off to check their polaroids….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Puff.
      No need for ‘sorry’. I’m still trying to get to all the posts I’ve missed on everyone’s blog, and as fast as I’m atching up, more posts are being added. I need a clone of me to help I think!

      Hope everything is ok with you and it’s only great stuff which is keeping you busy.
      Sending much love and squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Not great stuff, no. My mum has broken her ankle so needs some tlc and company. I am dividing my time as best I can. So glad you are back though!!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Oh Lord! When? How did she come to do that? Does she normally heal well?

          Aw Puff. I’m so sorry to hear this.

          Just a thought … would she like a card? Get Well; A card to make her smile?; just some good wishes. That sort of thing? Or … Maybe a few of us crafters could get together to send her some cards?

          (It’s just a thought. Don’t feel you have to.)

          Something about your messages feels like your plum tuckered out. I hope you’re taking care of yourself Missy.
          Sending squidges and love to you ~ Cobs. x

          Liked by 1 person

          1. She has osteoporosis, which I kind of suspected but was confirmed when she was hit by a car in 2015. She is normally so independent, and was really only forced to retire (aged 76!) because of the injuries she had. I don’t know for sure how she would feel about cards. I think she would like it though. She reads my blog and all the comments, and knows your name when I talk about you!

            Liked by 1 person

            1. I’ve got two cards which I have to get out of the way, and then I’ll make your mum a card, if that’s ok with you? …. I can send it to you or direct to your mum. Whatever you’d prefer. (Maybe to you wouldn’t quite freak her out, as you can remind her about me and then give her the card so that she knows who it’s come from. Don’t want to scare her! eeek!) xxx

              Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Fabulous Ruthie!
      See … you’re getting more and more clever as the weeks pass. Just like me. LOL.

      Popty ping my friend. Popty ping! ❤
      Squidges and …. I hope the weekend is everything you want it to be. Plus 10%. 🙂
      ~ Cobs. x


  4. Little dog trying to get your attention, and it works! lol Some get so excited don’t they, my male Chihuahua will bark and bark and bark even when the person is in the house and welcomed. Can’t hear when he’s doing that, and then he gets the blind, nearly deaf Boston going and it’s a gong show. All the while the wee girl Chihuahua is just saying hello quietly, like they all should.
    I learnt that a gutter filled with ice and moss and such, won’t stay on the house too long. All fixed tho’, thanks to a lovely neighbour guy that loves to help people in need.
    I do believe we are done with the snow, now dealing with rain again and melting snow. Huge amounts of water running down the roads, big puddles, lovely for wee kids in the gumboots to jump in, mind you they could disappear. 🙂 It’s very damp on the wild west coast of Vancouver Island, BC. I can’t wait for dryer weather.
    We do have daffodils starting to come up in the gardens and hyacinth too. Crocus and Snowdrops are making an appearance in the parks. Lots of buds coming on the Lilacs, it going to be very fragrant here soon 🙂
    Stay warm and dry Cobs and thank you wee doggy for being a good alarm.
    Happy Weekend.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Soozyb!
      Cooo… your weather sounds awful! Here I was complaining about how cold it is here, and how freeeezing it is of a nightime! Poor you … lots of snow… rain … torrents of water following all the rain, and, all in all, generally grim!

      We’ve got daffodils popping up in our garden too. They started putting in an appearance just before Christmas and I stood in the garden having a word with them telling them that they were too early and could they please slow down! Thankfully they haven’t tried to open up yet, so I’m hoping for a beautiful display when the weather warms up a little. (fingers crossed).

      The dog barking when someone comes to the door… The funny thing is that Mr. Cobs informs me that she doesn’t do it if I’m not in the house. If I’m in my craft room, or even in the bedroom, she lifts her ears and will sit to attention if someone knock the door … but she doesn’t bark. Mr.C says he reckons that she barks as a way of protecting me, since she only does it when I’m there.

      Bless her little heart. I love her so so much Soozy. She’s my baby and I totally adore her.

      Wishing you a wonderful weekend.
      Sending hugs and squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  5. So many truths in you blog today, but when it comes to tears and men, they always run away! Has the opposite effect for me, it’s usually me feeling sorry for them lol! So my little lad is not alone with strange behaviour then. When we go to bed at night, he starts what I call ‘the midnight watch’. He climbs on the arm of the sofa and sits upright looking out the window as if he’s on guard, only problem is, the curtains are always drawn and he still gives the odd growl every now and again! Around the middle of the night, in then bounds in, jumps on the bed, and makes himself comfortable, which usually means he steals most of my side of the bed! Wouldn’t have it any other way, he’s my bestest bud. Have a good weekend, hugs Kim x

    Liked by 3 people

    1. He sounds totally adorable! Bless his heart. I’m thrilled that he eventually steps down from guard duty and comes to bed with you.

      Our dog wouldn’t be able to make it up onto our bed, so Mr.Cobs takes one of the beds into the bedroom and she sleeps in that, next to my side of the bed, sometimes clambering out when she gets too hot, and she ‘flumps’ onto the floor next to me, and it’s then that I drop an arm out of bed and tickle her tummy for her. She loooooves her tummy tickled – and will go to sleep while I’m doing it. (She can’t half snore though! LOL)

      Thanks so much for coming Kim. It’s great to see you and have a chat.
      Have a truly lovely weekend. ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Flipping marvellous jokes! 😂 Cheered me up after a week of sickness bugs in our house. Also popty ping, an amazing word! Reminds me of when my friends told me (on a university trip) to Wales that I needed a passport to cross the border. I didn’t have one and got a bit worried, much to their amusement. (I don’t think boys ever grow up!) Have a lovely weekend x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. Boys never grow up. Mr.Cobs is still a boy. He plays X-box, loves cartoons, likes movies such as Toy Story, Wall-E, Ice Age, Shrek …. that type of thing. And is in his element playing with Grandsons Lego. I married a child. (no… he’s actually older than me. I’m not a cradle snatcher. LOL)

      Glad that the jokes gave you a smile, and sorry to hear you’ve all been poorly in Chez MrsCraft house!

      I LOVE that your friends convinced you that you needed a passport to get into Wales! Oh… that’s tickled the heck out of me that one. I shall be telling everyone here about this now. LOLOLOL. Brilliant!
      Sending gentle squidges so that they don’t wake up the germs. ~ Cobs. x


    1. Hello lovely Kathy!
      Awww, I’m just thrilled to pieces that you like the Friday posts of ‘What I’ve Learned This Week’. Thank you, and bless your heart. You’ve made me smile all the way to my heart.

      Popty Ping … I know!!! It’s such a rich, wonderful couple of words which make you want to use them over and over. We have Little Cobs coming today and I can see me teaching him these words and making them mean something special to him. Such fun. lol

      Wishing you a truly lovely weekend, filled with love and smiles. A memorable weekend, for all the right reasons.
      Sending squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Hello Cobs! This post had me laughing and smiling the whole way through. Your Friday posts are now on my list to do, it is too enjoyable to pass up. I think the bikini comment is a hall of fame one. That is almost as bad as someone asking a woman they don’t know when she is due.

    My son who is 12 is going to use a couple of your jokes. He loves a good pun. I thought they were pretty good too.

    It’s good to hear about the pheromone-laden tears I wonder what tears of anger and outrage have in them as we deal with our current embarrassment of a President. gggrrrrr….

    Anyway, I digress…..hope you are out learning new words (made up or not) to educate us this week. Thanks for the good laugh. Between you and PaperPuff I have had a few good laughs as I catch up on blogs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Absolutely laughing out loud here ….

      Chuffed to little bits that your son is getting good use of the jokes. My sense of humour is around the same age as your son is old, so it’s great to know I’m not alone in the innocent fun department. lol

      From my personal experience .. tears of anger make fellas run away … However … I don’t hold out much hope for this result as some chaps are lacking in empathy. Not saying this is the case in the gentleman you have in mind, obviously. 😉

      PaperPuff … oh my goodness. PaperPuff + Cobs = Chaotic Fun.

      Not sure if you’ve seen any of our ‘conversations’ via comments … but oh. my. goodness. They’re the things of Legends.

      I can’t remember where it happened – PP’s blog or this one (but I feel it was Puffs blog) … we invented a new Beer. PP Beer. She didn’t much like the idea of the name, but I thought it was the best! LOL … and we’ve gone through all sorts of sillyness, merriments , ridiculousness, absurdities, and downright daftness boarding madness.

      Ahh, it’s good to have a bit of fun. It makes the days so much more twinkly and sparkly – like glitter. Everyone should have an aim … mine is to make days twinkle. 😀

      Ooodles of love ❤ ❤ ❤ ~ Cobs 😡


  8. Pushing the wrong button seems to be my downfall. PC,iPad ,microwave doesn’t matter …I’ve mastered all of the wrong buttons. Spring is in the air and oh goodness even though winter hasn’t been all that bad down here I guess I just need the color and flowers of Spring to lift me up. I may even get the crazy idea of revamping the hoop house for early gardening. It has regrown since my son cut it down…now to be cut again. Wonder how many time he will do this before he throws up his hands and wonders about my brain not working.
    Pc still not back and who knows ……tech and I just do not get along. Live…why can I do this but can’t post on my own blog with this iPad????? Have a great day!


    1. aww Hello my lovely friend.
      Pushing the wrong buttons on my PC, my phone, Tablet, Mr.Cobs phone, Central Heating box thingy-ma-jig which controls the temperature and everything else, new washing machine (old one died) – which has 5 buttons, and two knobs – both of which you can set to a gazillion different settings, all of which do something different in some way … I cannot control this darn thing. I can’t even read the little button ‘reasons’ nor the knobs settings, unless I go in search of my reading glasses – and since the washing machine is in the garage …. [sigh].

      So .. I can relate to your problems.

      I fully agree with you about wanting Spring to be here. This cold weather is a pain in the you know what. Like you, Spring lifts my spirits too. I need to see the earth waking up again. Need to see the little flowers stretching and yawning after their long sleep, and then, one day, POP! Their flowers open and lift their little faces to Heaven. Aw, can’t wait!

      Glad you’ve got your iPad – because it at least allows you to play and paddle on the web.
      Take it easy Missy! Maybe this time is meant for you to sit back and just ‘be’. There’s a plan to ‘it’ all.
      Sending oodles of squidges and buckets of love ❤ ~ Cobs. x


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