Things I’ve Learned This Week.

Hello, and a very happy Friday to you!  I trust your week has been good and that no gremlins have got into your days.

Let’s, for a few minutes, move away from what’s happened, and happening, in the world today and lose ourselves in a bit of blogging fun for a little while.  Shall I begin?  Ok . . .   you know the drill: seatbelts on; allow your oxygen masks to drop from their over-head storage facility;   place your tin foil hats on your heads and hold hands with the person next to you  . . . .  let’s GO!

I learned this week that . . .

  • When the game  ‘Twister’  was introduced in 1966, it was denounced by critics as “sex in a box.”
  • There are more lifeforms living on your skin than there are people on the planet.  (yes that freaked me out a little bit too).
  • A human will eat on average 70 assorted insects and 10 spiders while sleeping. (ok… now that REALLY freaked me out!)
  • Fifteen percent of the air you breathe in a metro station is human skin.  (ewww!)
  • A group of Pugs (dogs)  is called ‘a grumble’.  (isn’t that the cutest thing!  lol)
  • Coca-Cola would be green if colouring wasn’t added to it.  (I wonder if that would affect sales?)
  • The United States, Burma, and Liberia are the only countries in the world that have not officially adopted the metric system as the standard of measurement. (This really surprised me.  I would have guessed that most of the world outside Europe still used good old feet and inches).
  • Blue Whale fart bubbles are large enough to enclose a horse. (ok, this tickled me enough to make me laugh)
  • Since 1945 all British Tanks come with tea making equipment.  (Yes, it’s true. I double checked).   Technically the device is called a Boiling Vessel ( BV ), or ‘bivvy’ in the troops’ parlance, which also then gets used to mean a hot drink in general.  Hence “necking a bivvy” means “drinking a cup of tea” ( or coffee ) in UK army slang.  You can read a little more on Wiki:

Did you know that Almost’ is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order?

I learned this week  . . .  The BIGGER the navel on an Orange, the sweeter the Orange will be.  “Hmmm,”  I thought, “could that be true, or just a load of rubbish”  . . .  So …  me, being me,  I had to check this out using the Oranges in the fruit bowl in the fridge.  I chose carefully, one on Wednesday and one Orange on Thursday . . .   It’s TRUE!  However, if I get an Orange with a large navel which is sour, I’ll let you know!

I also learned this week . . .  That the last name of the creator of the Simpsons, Matt Groening, is pronounced “Graining”, not “Growning”.

Something else I found out this week is that a TITTLE isn’t something naughty or rude, it’s actually the dot above a letter  ‘i’.  It’s called a Tittle.

Ohhh…  and this bit of new knowledge tickled the heck out of me this week ….    Calvin Klein’s  “Obsession for Men” is often used by photographers to attract ‘big cats’ – jaguars, leopards, tigers, lion, etc.  According to the Wildlife Conservation Society, the cats go crazy for it!  One zoo (Brookfield Zoo) even uses it to keep their big cats in very visible areas of their cages during business hours.

I’m rather glad that my cats don’t have such expensive tastes.  Cat-nip works perfectly for them.  lol

But anyhoo . . .   I know that the main reason you’re here isn’t to find out about things which I’ve come across and learned this week,  but you’re really here just for my [rubbish] jokes….  so here goes.  Brace Yourself!

Q: What do you call a computer floating in the ocean?
A: A Dell Rolling in the Deep.
~  ❤  ~
Q: Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica?
A: It’s dread-full.  (think about it for a moment and the penny will drop)
~  ❤  ~
Q: Why did the picture go to jail?
A: It was framed.
~  ❤  ~
Q. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and quackers!
~  ❤  ~
Q: How do you organize a space party?
A: You planet!
~  ❤  ~
Q: What washes up on very small beaches?
A: Microwaves!  ( . . . .  wait for the penny to drop)
~  ❤  ~
Q: What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
A: If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

and finally . . .
Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it would be a foot!  
(I love this joke, it’s up there with my favourites!)
~  ❤  ~
Well, that’s it for this Fridays lessons in life as we know it.  I hope that I’ve taken your mind off any troubles you have, made you wonder, made you smile and, if I’ve done my job properly …  I hope I made you laugh, even just a teeny tiny bit.

May your weekend be restful.  May smiles creep into your day and love show up in places too –  even if it’s your love for something that you love doing.

Think good wishes for the very next person you see on the street.  You might not know them, and, who knows, they too might read this blog post just like you do….  and if they do, they’ll be wishing good wishes for you – and you won’t ever know they did it.  But it might just make a difference, to you, and or to them themselves.  It doesn’t have to be something big or world-changing.  You could just wish that they have a great day.  That they find something to smile about today.  Wish them luck, love, peace, joy, contentment.  Anything.  Just make it a good wish.  You’ll be amazed at what a difference this small thing makes to you yourself too.

I wish you a truly blessed day.  HAPPY FRIDAY-ING!

Sending love,  from me here in my corner to you there in yours.




Author: The Art of Cobwebs - aka:- thecobweboriumemporium

Hello. I'm 'Cobwebs'. I live in a wee little cottage in the South of England, aptly called Cobweb Cottage. This little dwelling really is a cobweb factory. Not inside (well, occasionally) - but outside - flipping heck! This information should give you a clue as to why my blog is called The Art of Cobwebs aka: The Cobweborium Emporium. I've been arty and crafty from a very young age, and although my crafts have sometimes turned a corner and taken me in another direction, I've always crafted in some way, shape or form. One day, in the blink of an eye, life changed somewhat for me and the consequences were many. I had to find a new way of being 'artistic'. Card making; scrap-booking; producing ATC's and ACEO's; needle felting; Polymer clay; painting- but in a more relaxed style than I had before, and sewing, - are all things which I visit, as and when life allows. I've fairy recently become a Textile Artist and am enjoying this new creative outlet very much as it offers me so much scope for letting my imagination run through a grassy field and feel the wind in my hair - (mentally, of course). I love to create. To make things. I truthfully believe that the best gifts in the world are those in which you've given your time, rather than your cash. Thank you so much for visiting. Please visit my blog (link below) and have a look around. I'm sure you'll find something to enjoy, even if it's only a handful of jokes! (yes, seriously - there really are jokes!) Wishing you a truly blessed rest of your day! ~ Cobs. <3

45 thoughts on “Things I’ve Learned This Week.”

    1. I have to admit that I was slow to convert to metric and it’s only in recent years that I’ve begun using metric for measurements. . . but I still turn a measurement back into inches – and have been known to yell across a large store for Mr.Cobs to “convert 276cm into (as I tend to put it) English, please?” – meaning back into feet and inches.

      I can envisage feet and inches far more easily than I can metres and centmetres. But I’m getting better at it the more I use it.

      However … where it all falls down is with weights. When cooking or buying food products … I know what a pound of potatoes looks like, but a kilogram of potatoes could come and punch me on the nose and I wouldn’t recognise it. Same with pounds and ounces of things in the kitchen. I can guess at the required amount, but then if I weigh it, I’m more often than not right.

      But … the more you use something the quicker you get accustomed to it. So Metric will win in the end.

      Great to see you Scrappy! 🙂
      Squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I’ve never even considered blue whales farting ! I love your facts they’re usually things I’m never heard before. Keep up the jokes always a much needed giggle xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Claire, lovely to see you.
      No, I have to admit that the Whales and their fart bubbles wasn’t something I’d thought about before, but it tickled the heck out of me when I pictured it, in my minds eye. I want to be there when it happens – on a boat, right beside where the blue whale is, and watch as the bubbles float to the surface of the ocean and burst.

      Would I need a gas mask and a can of air freshener, I wonder? Because those are basic requirements with regard to my dog. Bless her little heart. lol

      Thanks for the visit and the comment Claire. Loved sharing a coffee with you! ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I was drinking coffee whilst reading your post 😃 I informed my son about the whales and he already knew ! How and why didn’t he inform me … 10 year olds know too much x

        Liked by 1 person

  2. So the expression should really be “tittling the ‘i’s and crossing the ‘t’s”?! Or will we find out next week that the cross stroke is actually called a ‘whoopsie’ or a ‘fluffle’ or something? The English language is a strange and wondrous thing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. actually laughing here.
      You tickled the heck out of me with that. I SOOOoooo wish they were called a whoopsie or a fluffle! How rich and wonderful would that be?
      How about that little curved connector between the top and bottom circle in the lower case type face letter ‘g’ …. I would so love for that to be called a fart or something ever so slightly on the childish naughty scale. LOL

      I agree … the English language really is strange and wondrous thing. lol
      Friday hugs coming your way PPuff ~ Cobs x

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh my word, the blue whale fart bubble fact is awesome. Next time a child lets one go in class I shall share that gem with them! This week I learned to stand up for myself and say I’m not teaching a particular class again. It was risky but I’m still getting bookings for other classes in the school. It’s scary being brave! Have a lovely weekend x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ohhh WELL DONE Mrs. Craft! I love that you’ve stood up and said No thank you to that particular class. You must have very good reason to do that, and I’m so happy for you.

      Yes, it really is scary being brave. I totally, absolutely agree.
      Sending squidges ~ Cobs. x


  4. So many of these are so funny and a couple (the bug swallowing and breathing in those skin cells) make me shiver!
    I remember in grade school they said we were going to convert to metric in the US. I am kind of glad they did not as it was hard! I suspect if we had done it I would have learned but bouncing between the two was hard.
    I love the good wishes plan at the end! I have decided to be the first to give a smile when meeting someone I do not know. Have a great weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. [nodding] . . . the converting of imperial to metric isn’t an over-night thing, as I’ve found out. And although I’m ‘getting it’ – I’m only getting it with smaller measurements – if we begin to talk about curtain drops, or carpet sizes, then I cannot think in metric and need imperial measurements so that I can visualise *that* size.

      Shops and even market stalls aren’t allowed (by law) anymore to sell greengrocery things, like potatoes, apples, general fruit and veg, in imperial measurements, so shops and market stalls get around this problem and display both imperial and metric weights and prices, so that all those folks who still haven’t ‘adapted’ can ask for what they require (eg 5lb of potatoes) but the vendor has to convert it and actually ‘sell’ the required item in a metric measurement.

      It’s a real pain in the you know what. But …. both of my daughters work only in metric and cannot visualise in imperial. They’ve grown up learning the metric system so they are 100% happy with metric measurements and weights.

      Love the giving of a smile, Chicken. Your smile reaches your eyes, and that is such a wonderful gift, both to giver and receiver.
      Sending squidges and smiley eyed smiles ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I learned metric when it came to liquids. I worked in a lab (making swine vaccine) for 6 years and had to learn. The measurments (like inches) leave me befuddled. But more things do that so maybe it is not the metric?

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Hannah. 🙂
      No, that whale fart was such a mind blower when I learned it. It kind of tickled me at first … then, as it slowly settled further into my brain, it became something I wanted to see with my own eyes. I don’t get it … but the desire to be there and watch that bubble raise to the top of the ocean and ……. B.U.R.S.T. …. that’s the bit I want to see. (and I have no idea why either. lol)
      Sending hugs ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Fun and informative as always, Cobs! I always read ‘Growning’, but pronounce it (to myself as I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned his name to anyone!) ‘Grerning’.
    And …hehehe… a couple of your jokes had me grerning this week as well!
    Have a good weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. A regular, jolly good ‘Grening’ is now available on prescription from your Dr. Or, at least … it should be.

      When I’m in charge of this country {cough} I’m going to make that a law.
      [thinks:-] “yeah, like this is going to happen missy! But carry on dreaming.” lol.

      Like you, I always read ‘Growning’. But now, after this week of ‘learnings’, I’m soooo much more intelligent. [snort]

      Wishing you a great weekend. I hope you achieve something you wanted to; encounter something which makes you laugh; and feel wrapped in the love of your family and friends.
      Squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I knew about the bug thing, but it doesn’t make it any easier to swallow. lol The fart thing tho’, wow, that is a big bubble. 🙂 Still smiling from this “things I learnt”, good stuff in there. I do hope you have a wonderful weekend.
    We are in the rains again but that is NOT supposed to start until later, so we want to get out for awhile now and hope we get before the downpour.
    Thanks again for the giggle. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Soozyb. 🙂
      Lovely to see you. Yes .. the bubble got me thinking in all sorts of ways. LOL. (I did have a moment of: ‘wouldn’t it be fun if humans farted bubbles that big?’ … but I quickly got over that. LOL)
      Sending squidges ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Thank you for imparting another round of veritable facts for our delication, you are a complete mind of information, I have to hold my hand up to being sooooo non metric, yet I still manage to buy, weigh, and measure things LOL
    Poor Moo struggles with kilometres he always asks how many miles is that ? ~ bless his soul

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Moo is the man!

      With regard to miles … (confession coming. Get ready for this one . . . ) . . . I tend to ask Mr.Cobs to work out how long, in hours and minutes, a particular journey will take. [sigh] … there is no hope for me. Save yourself P.
      Sending oodles of squidges. ~ Cobs. x

      Liked by 1 person

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